Wax Tablets

Patrick Killian
Nov 6 · 3 min read

When your eleven year old DMDD daughter enthusiastically crashes through your office door — while your in the middle of having a discussion — with your wife — ‘bout her, to begin with…is the perfect way to begin this journey.

— Obtuse to the fact that anything else in the Multiverse might be happening at the same precise moment around her, she hands in haste… wee bit manic, her five-page heavy-handed, concentrated impressions of lead, of thought, of emotion, of imagination on high, spil’n-out all over her torn-out notebook paper.

Parading her story like any fine pedantic… with fervent reckless passion —

— off the cuff, she say’s dad; “I wrote this, — tell me what you think.”

I say… “okay give me a few to find my marbles.”

I read ‘out loud the story shortly thereafter with my wife, while Clo’ was working out in the garden, pulling up dead sunflowers… and — it became one of those drop-the-mic moments that you have to take an elevator to get back up… to pull your dislocated jaw of the ground.

The girl won’t do a lick of school-work, fights you academically 24–7 and then hands you a story that is dictated like a vetran. What the fuck?

Here is the deal about crazy people; they reach depths that ordinary mortals can only dream of…and most likely could not handle. I’m privy to this fact.

To have such descriptive illustration with all the senses so intact, cohesive working in harmony, illustrated outwardly, so well in the story is very impressive,(considering she does very poorly at practicing this in reality)but… to be able to convey thought and emotion well, means well… I believe, even if it has “yet” to fully mature, the process has begun.

To be able to articulate like this at such a young age is astonishing to me, esp. with her disposition. But what do I know, I’m an idiot ‘bout… pretty much everything.

She asked for help with editing, wants to publish it… imagine that!

She said; “would you post it on your blog?”….. I’m thinking wow! — there it is. Yes of course! Lets channel this energy and power little super nova.

Clo’ has a very powerful inner-vocation and I think somehow, perhaps writing may do for her what it has done for me all my life, brought me peace of mind and clarity, my best friend at times…my land-line to God, and a trail of bread crumbs, so as never to get lost in the enchanted forest.

Again… its the little shit that makes the biggest difference. Our kids are always watching us, listening to us — unbeknownst to us… imprinting.

We are not just raising — one generation of kid — when we bring a child into this world, we are raising parallel future generations in the moment, tangent to the now. This is how we break and make cycles for a better future for all the children, for all mankind.

The mind’ wax tablet.

Clear, soft, impressionable when first-formed — it discloses itself to itself, the Id being examined by the Odd — creating tension.

Tension constitutes growth, makes the wax soft-r — making permanent impressions to live by.

This is how small-positive changes…of awareness change the world in a very big way. It always begins with us ‘tho… doesn’t it? Are we present?

I was given the gift…albeit poorly, to write by my mother, perhaps Clo’ will do the same for her children some day…but write better, after her successful education, after graduating from a University wielding a PHD, she will look back and see how writing truly makes our story come alive. Life is story…from the beginning to end, we write it.

I believe she has every equal-right to achieve all the best this world can afford her, to be well, to live well. I believe this to be obtainable, I believe it can, and will happen for anybody that can hold true to their dream.

This world affords us all the same. We chose what to do with it.

Patrick Killian

Written by

I’m semi-retired, family man, self employed artisan living my dream life. Been in recovering for 29 years from addiction, mental health issues. It’s doable.

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