Tension between Uniqueness and Connection: limits on diversity?

Many of us seem to posess a drive towards being unique, being special. Nothing crazy here. Many San Franciscans also verbalize their support of diversity and a diverse culture — a culture of many unique individuals that span the space of races, genders, origins, and so forth.

Simultaneously, we seek connection and intimacy — an emotional safe harbor, home, and love. I often hear words like “chosen family” and “finding my tribe” from the same San Franciscans. Connection relies on an amount of commonality between participants — a common experience, cause, belief, set of values, etc.

It appears to me that the drive towards diversity and the drive towards connection can sometimes create a tension. I’m curious: What’s the limits of diversity? What’s the “correct dose”? What’s the tradeoff? How much and by what measure? Is there so much diversity and such a drive to uniqueness that we can’t find the deep intimacy and connection we crave? Or is this a false dichotomy, and how so?

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