Growing Old Ain’t For Sissies

Both my mother and father-in-law celebrated their 90th birthdays in 2014. My mother’s birthday is January 3rd. My father-in-law is very gleeful about telling me that she’s older than he is. They are a study in contrasts. Mom is active and engaged. She lives in a semi-assisted living environment. Right now she can do everything for herself. My father-in-law is in a wheelchair and can’t walk even after having yet another knee replacement. He’s in too much pain. He spends the day by himself most of the time except for Gigi, a wonderfully patient and loving Haitian immigrant who comes to the house in the morning, helps him shower and dress and makes him breakfast and lunch and sometimes dinner for later if she has the time. Reaching 90 is a challenge. Both of the parents are actually in very good health — especially for people as old as they are. However, the sad part is how many people have died. My mother, in particular, has lost a lot of friends and relatives. She finds herself living with a narrowed group of people. We all know the alternative, of course. Neither of them is concerned about death. They both believe in Heaven. I wish I did.