Road to Self discovery

Identity crisis hits mostly at teenage hood, this is when everything that was normalized begins to unfold in form of questions, some of us at that time even questioned our existence, it is at this time that parents and guardians need to stick very close because it can be a make or break period.

Series of adolescent changes, the sudden discovery to seek recognition and acceptance. It is at this point self esteem is developed or lost. Peer pressure is build or controlled at this point, the bible also warns against company, “Don’t be deceived bad company corrupts good character”. Its at this point deviant behavior may be experienced amongst children, not all deviant behaviour requires punishment, some behaviours are a yearning for attention, or a cry for help. This requires a lot of wisdom to detect. One may want to feel an empty vacuum by engaging in deviant behavior, not to punish anyone but to satisfy a feeling of emptiness.

No one chooses which family, race or culture there will be born or raised in, today one could be rich the next decade they are poor, it could be due to natural calamities like drought, floods or death of a sole bread winner. One therefore may find themselves in a dysfunctional family involuntarily. In search of normalized life a person from a dysfunctional family may seek attention and acceptance from the wrong peers. In advanced places, or where this problem is diagnosed counselling may help deal with the root problem, however where everything is normalised the effects of identity crisis could long affect individuals for a long time, perhaps even in old age.

Identity crisis can also be experienced when one is choosing their career road. I suffered this, straight after Highschool after being among the best students in History my greatest dream was to be a Lawyer. I could not convince my peers that I could make a good lawyer with my soft spoken personality. One thing that I have been misunderstood for the longest. Besides being soft spoken I am very firm and tough, at least those who try to get to know me understand and appreciate this. This lot does not have doubt that I can make the best lawyer because they understand behind the soft spoken Phyllis is a tough and firm critical and systematic thinker who you wouldn’t fool easily. And they also know that I can be patient to all sorts of misunderstanding because I don’t need to shout to be heard or seen.

This I have come to learn after years of seeking to be heard or recognised . No, at the end of the day we are not measured by how loud we are but the actions. Yes am the Beta lady who mostly may be misunderstood for their soft spokeness but I am also that lady who is keen to detail. I will be silent when you argue but I will figure out and respond when I have thought it over. I will double check, this is just who I am, the who that I have become.

Growth is a process today you are here, tomorrow you are there, each day you discover who you can become. I aspire to become a better version on me everyday I this road of self discovery. On the road I have met very important people who have helped me to become a better version, I appreciate those who dedicate their lives for growth. One day I will mention them because God brought them in my life when I so much needed a hand to hold on to. God uses men as His vessels to bring out his purpose. I appreciate every destiny helper that God has brought forth in my life, when they was a casting down God brought a word of uplifting. When I was meant to fall God raised me.




Embracing Positivity for Self growth

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Embracing Positivity for Self growth

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