The coming out process is — obviously — very different from person to person. My case I am very lucky that my family is a long line of strong women living life on their own terms. After being open that I did queer porn and was selling dildos for a living, that I was bisexual/queer and poly didn’t really raise any eyebrows.

I made myself open for family questions and framed it for a family member who was struggling to understand that “I know you love this ex still, and I know you love *current partner* just as much. My poly works in a way that I can still openly love & have a relationship with that beloved ex and be stable and happy with my partner.”

Explained that yes, I do sometimes feel jealousy but instead of internalizing it, my partner talk about that jealousy, find the root of why I’m feeling that way and address it. Told them that yes, it is more difficult in many ways but it’s given me amazing tools for addressing my feelings openly, as well as how to talk about my relationship.

As I work in sexuality, coming out at work has been completely safe. Being poly is almost expected. That being said, coming out in the workplace can be perilous and most folks I know keep themselves in the closet. Laws on discrimination in the workplace vary wildly, I’d suggest investigating your rights regarding sexuality and relationship configuration before approaching that subject.

Did I cover your question with this? If not I’m happy to keep answering =)