You Made Me Strong

Colleen Kiernan
Aug 26, 2017 · 3 min read

When I was weak, you made me strong

When I wanted to cry, you were there, holding my heart

When I am angry, you give me a voice

When I am alone, you are always by my side

You always made me smile

A month ago, I would never have told anyone about the thoughts of grabbing a kitchen knife. I was too embarrassed, too ashamed, too scared. And now, I am openly sharing it with the world, and it’s all because of you.

We all have our heroes, and like the comic book super heroes, I think we tend to believe they are invincible. Nothing and no one can ever take them from us. To an extent, yes that is true, I will never see your smile again or get a hand-drawn skull from you, but you will live forever in the hearts of us all.

I’ve always been scared to tell people the truth, just how dark it can get in my head. I am afraid they may be scared, afraid they may stop loving me, afraid that the truth will make me just as lonely as I feel in my head. But you are showing me, in your absence, that I was wrong. I thought that making someone smile once a day was enough. It’s good, great even, to make someone smile, it’s a powerful thing, but now, it’s not enough for me. I need to do more. I need to be strong, for everyone who has ever felt the way I did.

Well I do….

None of us ever imagined you would leave this way. That is why we need to talk about these demons. We need to talk and we need to listen. We need to examine the darkness. It is only by acknowledging the dark that we can show, and spread the light.

From here until the end of my days, I will no longer be afraid. It won’t be easy, and it hasn’t been to this point. Talking about the darkness does not make us victims, it should not make us feel embarrassed, ashamed or scared. Talking about it will help us understand it, fight it and ultimately kick its ass!

If you don’t feel strong today, that’s okay, you are not alone, and tomorrow is a new day that can bring you strength. And for others who don’t know the darkness as well as some, be patient and understanding. It is difficult shining light on the darkness. It really is horrifying, but together we can make this life a little bit brighter.

Thank you for making me strong Chester.

Help me raise awareness for mental health issues and suicide prevention by donating to the One More Light Fund: https://www.gofundme.com/easier-to-run.

It’s easier to run…

#MakeChesterProud

In case you or someone you know needs support, here are some resources:

Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1–800–273-TALK

Crisis Text Line, the free, nationwide, 24/7 text message service for people in crisis, is here to support. For support in the United States, text HELLO to 741741 or message at facebook.com/CrisisTextLine.

For support outside the US, find resources at http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html

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