Dear Diary.

I can’t believe I am still making mistakes. I can’t believe I have been here, here in the same place, for just over a year, and I am still making mistakes, still forgetting things, and he’s right. I can’t use the same excuse anymore. I am not new to this, I can’t say I forgot. Even though I honestly did this time.

I came back after lunch. He point blank asked me. And I couldn’t lie, not to his face. Fact I can’t lie to anyone, not even if it saves my arse. I thought directly after, Why? Why couldn’t I just lie to him, why couldn’t I just save my own arse, so what if he lost out on X amount of money.

Personally I believe it’s stupid charging customers to use a pre-made shitty collage template anyway. Well I certainly can’t be saying that around the work place. Can I?

What is actually wrong with me? Why does it take me longer to get things? Is there actually something wrong? As I get older, I start to believe it more and more. I said nothing, to he’s statement, I know I shouldn’t be making those mistakes anymore. But honestly, it was a human mistake. The thought even cross my mind. Is this really my fault? For now, it can only be.

- I’m sorry Sonam. I should have saved you. I should have lied for you, I froze. I froze. No words came out my mouth, my mind went blank. I’m sorry I was not there in that moment, to help you. You needed me, and I wasn’t there. -

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