An open letter to a distant friend

There is so much that I am holding back.

The tears, the laughs, the doubts.

So who should I share it with?

You…

Yes, you were and are always the first person that I want to reach out to, tell you all that is creating a storm within me. But you have shut me, so much so that I have stopped trying to break that wall.

There are those days when I try and see if I can climb over it. Maybe it is the memories of the good times of the tears that we have wiped off each other’s faces. Maybe it is the fights that we have had over silly things.

Maybe…

Maybe…

Unfortunately, it all feels like a maybe.

Tired of the terse replies, of the fake strong front that you have put, I decided to share this with someone who knows both of us.

It all came down to why was I even expecting someone to take time out of busy schedule.

Well, I am not.

I understand the work protocol, I understand you want to make it big. I am as ambitious as you are, but not at the cost of leaving the loved ones behind.

Never.

And that is not because am a family person. No.

It is because I treasure you.

I treasure the moments with you. I know how lonely life gets, and that is when you had come to my life to stand by me.

I cannot imagine not sharing parts of my life with you.

And that my friend is what you mean to me: a part of my heart, of my life.