The Grand Conspiracy (allegedly)

By now, most of you know what happened on February 9, 2015. Two of television’s most trusted voices made moves, one voluntarily, one not.

Brian Williams was suspended for six months without pay due to a fish story he told on various talk shows concerning a helicopter ride he took in 2003. Almost within the hour, Jon Stewart made this startling announcement:

And as people started to realize that both earth-shattering announcements, the irony started to sink in. And as that irony started to sink in thoughts of THIS started swimming in people’s minds…..

Not to mention the possibility that the REAL reason Stewart left is that he has already been tapped to be the new anchor of NBC Nightly News.

And as outrageous as it sounds, not too many people think its that far off.

Jackie Willis, for instance, of etonline.com (aka Entertainment Tonight), says this:

The 55-year-old has the comedy chops, he looks good in a suit and he knows the news — so why not have Williams give The Daily Show a go?

Now ET, The Daily Show, and Comedy Central are all properties of Viacom, a service of National Amusements, owned by Sumner Redstone. National Amusements also owns separately CBS. And that is where my grand conspiracy theory begins.

A reminder, this is pure speculation on my part. But I think it makes damned good sense.

Also understand that Comedy Central has said that they have narrowed their replacement to Stewart down to a short list. If I am right, that list is actually one name, a name selected some time ago, and one that is a part of a much bigger plan.

You see, there are really three Comedy Centrals: The Daily/Nightly Shows, South Park, and Everything Else.

And that “everything else” consists of a hodgepodge of stand-ups, some originals, a roast or two, but mostly “comedy” movies that didn’t make a dime (for instance the triple feature set for Friday the 13th of February, 2015 consists of Me Myself and Irene, Bachelorette, and Zach And Miri Make a Porno. Riveting.)

Right now, the channel’s largest audience comes from Daily/Nightly, followed by the venerable (translation: long-in-the-tooth) South Park. The question must have been brought up at some point: What if we can expand this Daily Show thing 24/7 (or maybe 19/7…we still need the infomercials)?

And…what if someone acted on it.

Step one. Getting Brian.

I would think that getting Williams on board with this idea would not be hard. All you need is cash and Uncle Sumner has a crapload of it. The problem was Williams in on a long-tern contract with Comcast/NBCUniversal. And I would think that the original idea was a Williams show, Followed by Daily and, at the time The Colbert Report. Now of course, when Stephen was kicked upstairs by Uncle Sumner (translation named to replace David Letterman as host of the Late Show), it would just be Williams and Stewart, who were very good friends….

So Viacom comes to NBC and says they want the services of Mr. Williams for this expanded Daily Show-esque idea. NBC says yes…under one condition: you give US Stewart.

Now, it is no secret that NBC News considered Stewart to take over The Oldest Show On TV Still On, Meet The Press. And it is possible Stewart was offered. Maybe he turned it down, maybe he was holding out for something bigger, or maybe they dropped the idea. But for a news operation that has had quite a bit of snark attached to it (David Brinkley, Lloyd Dobyns, Linda Ellerbee, and more recently, Rachel Maddow and Keith Olbermann), a jon Stewart-anchored newscast would not be out of the question.

Anyway, the trade is advanced, everyone says yes. Now….

Step Two: How to get America’s Most Trusted Anchor off the stage.

Most at NBC probably knew that Williams ‘copter story was less of a lie and more of, what Williams said in his mea culpa part of the “fog of memory.” This one would be the easy part. Get a couple of guys on the copter to complain, loudly. People see the pressure for NBC to “do something.” Brian says he’s off for several days (probably already in Florida after signing the contracts.). The suspension. Jon quits. All is in order.

Remember, in my scenario, all this was designed to “de-anchor” Williams juuuuust enough so he can still have that serious anchor vibe, but tarnished juuuuust enough so he can take a less serious job believably.

Step Three: What’s next.

Again, this is all my weird speculation, but if I am right, during the next nine months, the following:

1. It is announced that both the new Daily Show and The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore both expand to an hour in the fall.
2. CC starts signing up satirical minds for new projects. People like Stephanie Miller, John Fugelsang, Hal Sparks and others would be courted. Dennis Miller, who is currently under contract Fox News, could be wooed, as would D. J. Hugely.
3. CC announces an AM version of Daily to compete with the Morning Joes of the world.
4. CC negotiates with Trey and Matt to Keep South Park on CC but move the new shows to Fridays as part of a new prime time night of originals.
5. Viacom announces the closing of the Spike channel.
6. Viacom announces a creation of a new all-topical satire channel that would either be a re-branding of Comedy Central or a replacement for Spike.

Meanwhile, over at NBC, Jon Stewart would either take over Nightly News (unlikely) or produce and/or host a Daily Show-esque program for MSNBC as part of a programming re-do. Also Stewart would be given a development deal as a producer across all NBC brands.

As I said, this is speculation. But I think it could work. Tell me what YOU think.