What is passive aggression? 4 signs and examples you can recognize it
Have you ever experienced passive-aggressive behaviors from other people around? Or even you are the one who has passive-aggressive behavior frequently?
According to APA, passive-aggressive behavior refers to seemingly harmless, random, or neutral behavior that indirectly demonstrates an unconscious aggressive motive.
Passive aggression is a pattern of behavior that people are unwilling to express their anger, disapproval, or frustration openly and directly. Instead, people with aggressive behavior may show these negative emotions through disguised actions, avoidance, and non-verbal cues without directly confronting or openly communicating those feelings.
Passive aggression can be both intentional and unintentional.
Signs and examples of passive-aggressiveness:
Passive-Aggressiveness can occur with subtle hints. In order to make it clear how passive-aggressive people will behave, I use some typical examples to demonstrate how passive-aggressiveness manifest.
People with passive-aggressive behaviors might:
1. avoid direct communication:
rather than openly expressing their true concerns or needs, passive-aggressive individuals may use subtle hints, sarcasm, or veiled comments to convey their dissatisfaction or disapproval.
Examples: They seem apparently disturbed and unhappy, but when you ask them what is going on with them, or are they angry. They will appear like nothing happens and answer you”No, I am not angry.”
2. procrastinate or being intentionally inefficient:
Deliberately delaying or avoiding tasks, responsibilities or commitments can be a way of expressing frustration or resisting authority indirectly. Sometimes, they will purposely behave inadequately, be inefficient in the work, or make mistakes to express their anger and resistance.
Examples: Their boss has given them tasks they are not willing to do. Instead of directly addressing their own thoughts and feelings, they may appear seemingly reluctant to do the work but they will procrastinate, or make mistakes purposely while doing the work, to show their disapproval of the decision of their boss.
3. give silent treatment to show sullenness:
people with passive-aggressive behaviors may give silent treatment, show sullenness or refuse to continue the conversation, to convey their displeasure or manipulate others.
Examples: after the fight with their partner, They refuse to speak to their partner or they ignore their partner intentionally. They use this way to avoid open conversation and to express their aggressiveness by ignoring to punish the person they are upset with.
4. Give backhanded compliments:
they might give compliments with a hidden aggressive motive or an underlying tone of sarcasm to show their displeasure.
Example: Your parents ask you to do the chores you don´t want. Rather than saying no, you may agree to do the chores and compliment your parents like ” Thank you for giving me such a great task.”
Conclusion:
In conclusion, passive aggressiveness is a complex behavior that can manifest in various ways, making it challenging to identify and address. Throughout this article, I have mentioned several examples and signs of passive aggressiveness. These include avoidance of open communication, procrastination, silent treatment with sullenness, and backhanded compliments among others.
It’s a bit difficult to spot their pattern early on, as passive-aggressive can initially seem subtle and harmless. I hope the above signs and examples could help you to recognize the pattern of if you’re suffering passive aggressiveness.
