Hey, that’s no way to say goodbye

I’ve just bailed out of a farewell speech at work because, you know, AWKWARD! Still had like 2 weeks left then and it just felt very anti-climatic. Also, I needed a little bit more time to figure out how to say this.

This is not going to be a list of ‘those were the great times and thank you’… you guys already know all that.

This agency will always be my alma matter — like everyone else whose left before, it becomes so deeply entwined in your life that you cease to look at this place as work. I’ve gotten into and lived through the break down of major relationship while at EC and this place had kept me grounded, kept me busy, kept me sane.

Maybe that’s not always a good thing.

So I need to move out, like a bumbling teenager​ — find my way in the wider world. It’s been too long since I felt scared, taken a risk, been broke, done an odd job, bet on an idea and generally ran wild. For the minority here at EC who knew me before Season 2 — that’s not me. And a lot of you may think this stabler, older, surer version is definitely an improvement.

I disagree.

You see, everyone has a special sauce — it’s not about strengths and weaknesses in your CV. A very wise man once told me that people have these generic skills — diligent, dependable, great pitcher and all that — then you have the specialist skills, or rather unique life things. You might be an account manager — but when you were fresh out of college you tried launching a football magazine… Or you can be a planner now — but you almost became an architect… or you’re writing Science Fiction… you can bend spoons… you rode to Ladakh to rescue people… you played state level cricket… you make tables from scratch… you are a future human rights lawyer… Something about you that makes you perfectly you.

For me, I’ve somehow lost that something over the years. I’ve done what’s needed for the agency, whenever and whatever needed… but I lost my special sauce. I remember what it used to be… I was a creator — I had a wonderful blog long before bloggers became paid influencers on twitter. But thats long gone and I need to look again, find something else.

I also got my priorities in life mixed up a bit — the comfort renders you lazy — and you start believing that the best thing you have to give to the world is a perfectly written deck. While it was great pushing PPTs for the time — it limits you. It limited me.

I want to leave you guys with a two thoughts —

Don’t ever stop looking outside

It’s the most scary thing to do, throwing yourself up to the world’s stage and knowing where you stand. Knowing that you don’t know something is hard but necessary. Somedays I look at my work and begin to realise that it’s all just common sense, it shakes up my foundations. Yes, it’s a terrifying thing to do — But do it anyways, be scared, be un-sure and be constantly doubtful — you wont grow otherwise.

And growth is never linear — look outside and grow laterally, but also —

Think from the inside out

Sometimes, we spend too much much time building our google based knowledge and scanning advertising news and reading digital growth reports… and too little time thinking about things. There is a drawing technique that I have been studying — it asks you to never outline a sketch, but draw the contours of the subject like you would feel it with your fingertips.

Figure out the inner workings of an idea, find its curves, shapes and turns and edges — nothing is an outline.

I’m going off to see the world now, and think more deeply about stuff.

I felt that if I didn’t do this — I will honestly fail myself both professionally and personally. If not anything else, just have intellectual honesty. I know such drifting behaviour is not always be appreciated — but I’m willing to take a chance and discover continents of the mind.

I’ll leave you with my caller tune :)

There’s no need for anger
There’s no need for blame,
There’s nothing to prove
Everything’s still the same.
Just a table standing empty
By the edge of the sea
So Farewell Angelina…
The sky is calling,
And I must leave.

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