The art of shutting up
In 1825, a new czar, Nicholas I, ascended the throne of Russia. A rebellion immediately broke out, led by liberals demanding that the country modernize — that its industries and civil structures catch up with the rest of Europe. Brutally crushing this rebellion (the Decembrist Uprising), Nicholas I sentenced one of its leaders, Kondraty Ryleyev, to death.
On the day of the execution, Ryleyev stood on the gallows, the noose around his neck. The trapdoor opened — but as Ryleyev dangled, the rope broke, dashing him to the ground. At the time, events like this were considered signs of providence or heavenly will, and a man saved from execution this way was usually pardoned. As Ryleyev got to his feet, bruised and dirtied but believing his neck had been saved, he called out to the crowd, “You see, in Russia, they don’t know how to do anything properly, not even how to make rope!”
A messenger immediately went to the Winter Palace with news of the failed hanging. Vexed by this disappointing turnabout, Nicholas I nevertheless began to sign the pardon.
But then: “Did Ryleyev say anything after this miracle?” the czar asked the messenger.
“Sire,” the messenger replied, “he said that in Russia they don’t even know how to make rope.”
“In that case,” said the Czar, “let us prove the contrary,” and he tore up the pardon. The next day, Ryleyev was hanged again. This time the rope did not break.
Had Ryleyev kept his mouth shut, he would have been pardoned but he could not control his tongue.
The human tongue is a beast that few can master, if not tamed, it will run wild and cause you grief, just like it did for Ryleyev.
We humans often find ourselves speaking without thinking, and later feeling remorse for our hasty words.
Excessive talking stems from a desire to avoid silence. Some people find silence uncomfortable, seeing it as awkward. Thus, they may feel compelled to keep the conversation going by speaking more than needed.
It was Zeno that said “The reason why we have two ears and only one mouth is so we can listen more and talk less”
There are some that tend to talk a lot because they harbor a fear of coming across as dull or unimportant in conversations. To compensate for this fear, they may engage in non-stop talking or try to display their intelligence.
When you try to impress people with words, the more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.
The wise speak because they have something to say, the fool speaks because he has to say something
You must know when there’s a need to speak. When speaking with another, you must listen to understand, not to reply.
Many people are far too self-centered, to the point where they simply interject without thought during a conversation, but this is not the way to go; you must let them be the stars of their own show.
If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, you have to be interested.
A sword without a sheath is like a tongue without restraint. Just as a sword without a sheath can cause harm and injury to those around it, a tongue without restraint can cause hurt and damage through careless or malicious words. It is important to be mindful of the words we use and to exercise restraint and self-control in our speech, just as a sword must be kept in its sheath to prevent harm.
While remaining silent can be a powerful tool, one must exercise caution in its prolonged use as it can bring about negative outcomes such as misunderstandings, missed opportunities, and internalized emotions.
Silence can arouse suspicion and even insecurity, it must be practiced with caution and in the right situations.
