Alone in the Tower of Babel

A reminder about self-worth, for Valentine’s and any other day

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The Wrong Takeaway

I’ve spent my life learning the wrong lesson from the books, TV, and other media I consumed. At best it was an important lesson that I gave too much of my attention, to the detriment of myself and the people around me.

This insidious message, drilled into me from nearly the cradle? The great importance of friends, partners and generally being surrounded by people.

Harry Potter, Friends, and Star Trek ceaselessly focus on the value of building and maintaining relationships. In Lord of the Rings, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, and just about any of the TV serial dramas I used to watch with my parents, the group is essential; being alone is to be at the mercy of our chaotic and cruel world.

I subconsciously saw this as a kind of golden tenet, and followed it in the misguided belief that my place in a social group was more important in the long run than my own personal development. Throw in some staunch moral values and this approach certainly seemed to carry Frodo, Harry, Phoebe Buffay, Jonathan Harker and so many others across the finish line without much character…