Shreyaa, episode 2

So… after Rabin made the food and her whole mood untasty in the canteen and went away, sushma forces Shreyaa to go with her to Rabin’s class.

So, Sushma tells Shreyaa, “Let’s go, he’s gone to his classroom probably”

“No, leave it.”, said Shreyaa.

“But you won’t get another chance today after this. He lives on the other side of town so no chance to talk while going home too…” replied sushma in a concerned, tense face. She probably wanted to see the romance happening.

Shreyaa said, with that half-scared face,” we’ll do it tomorrow, no big deal… “

*They keep walking towards their class.*

Shreyaa goes to washroom while sushma waits outside.

Sushma, raised in a rich family was always surfing through boys. She recalls exchanging letters in sixth grade with the tallest boy. She remembers when boys teased her even when she was in sixth grade as she was in the ladies football team and she’d also talk innocently and merrily talk to her seniors, who always looked at her in a different way. One time her little brother got into fight with another boy because bad things were said about his sister and he couldn’t tolerate it. She wasn’t bad but neither was she that Christian nun type. She was experimental, she wanted to experiment things in life and experience them. She had already drank alcohol at her home and smoked with her boyfriend as a part of her experiments. She left smoking but not booze because it was different. She starts recalling each of her boyfriends and Shreyaa comes in the middle.

They go to the class and the day ends.

Sushma reaches home. Before she changes her clothes, she poses in the mirror with that exhausted-but-still-sexy vibe. She changes poses, pouts and winks perfectly, that could kill a guy if he was there. After she does all the poses, she begins to change clothes, thinking why he wouldn’t notice her. Why? Was it because she wasn’t good looking? Was it because she was with too many friends? Was it because she never crosses his ways? Why? She thinks to herself that maybe she should quit all the efforts and focus on study and maintain good marks. The thoughts keep flowing as the evening progresses.

The next day, before going to college, she begins to dress and delays to dress up because she was trying to look perfect. She thought, “Maybe not for you. Why shouldn’t I be good looking while going to college? “, while the faint thought that even if she doesn’t get his attention, she will get others’ was boosting her self-esteem while getting dressed up.

She goes to college. On the way she imagines how the day would go, sushma pushing her around to talk to Rabin, pause. Her heart beat fastens and she wishes him to not be in college. She thinks of the ways to avoid him, the path she would take in college up to her class, what she would do if she would accidentally see him. And also thinks of ways to avoid sushma because goddammit that girl pushes her to do things so much.

Then she reaches the college and enters the class successfully without seeing Rabin. She saw his friend but she pretended to watch somewhere else with interest. She sits in her class and as she breathes, the bell rings.

A thought crosses her mind on first period, about a minute before the teacher entered, while the class was in its busy roar. It was that since her childhood, she noticed that schools and institutions like such had a way of repeating themselves. All the periods, all the hallways, the repetitive architecture of the academic buildings everywhere, the boring teachers on plain clothes, the students on uniform, all the stuff. But all that kept life going were the little incidents that happened so as to break the repetitive patterns of boring times, like the gossips about teachers’ love affairs, the principals’ earned property, history of some badass teachers who gave unforgettable punishments, love stories among the class, etc.

We should be busy in life to live it happily, she thought.

The day began normally with her head full of thoughts. Sushma wasn’t there to push her today. Shreyaa turned around to see her and she was readily looking at her. She waved and just as she was about to think of what to greet, teacher entered. She smiled and turned forward. The world was crazy to her now. She tried to focus on study and Rabin’s thoughts crossed. Then the guy on the right asks for a spare pen and she thinks of what she would do in the long break, whether to pretend to be not hungry or fasting or something to avoid the possible events of emotional rollercoasters.

The long break begins. So does her uneasiness. Sushma, more ready than a kid about to go to a family picnic, came to her and said, “Let’s go.” With a smile that read “I can’t wait to see this happening.”

Sushma kept secrets because that was a crucial part of her growing up. So when Shreyaa asked her if she has told anyone about it, she said no confidently.

Sushma said to her, “I’ve messaged him yesterday that we are going to be in his class right after the break begins. “

Shreyaa said, “What? No, not right now, I’m not ready.”

“Ready? You are ready don’t worry. Now listen…

..No we should go right after eating lunch…” interfered Shreyaa.

“Are you crazy? What will he think about you if we don’t go?” said sushma.

“Whatever, let’s not go right now.” said Shreyaa, in a nervous tone.

But sushma was an athlete, so she forced her to go to the way that led to Rabin’s class.

“Don’t worry Shreya, just act normal, I’ll do the talking and I’ll introduce you so next time when you come to return the book, it will be easier for you. If you don’t do this now, I won’t talk to you and you will regret this your whole life.”

Getting the chance to not talk to her was okay. But she knew what sushma said was true, that she would regret if she didn’t talk to Rabin.

They enter his classroom, acting normal successfully. Sushma waves at Rabin and he waves back.

Rabin is sitting there with his close friend talking to a tall bulky girl. She doubts for a moment if he was…

“Go and talk”, said sushma and pushes her gently. She talks to another girl and violently tells Shreyaa to go.

Pause for this moment.

Shreyaa is feeling like she’s stuck in a frenzy. As she can’t turn back and leave, because that’d make her a loser in his eyes. So she had to go, and she had to talk, and she had to win the day.

Play.

She walks up to him and says,” excuse me, are you Rabin?”

“Yes,?” says Rabin, dramatically turning head away from that girl towards Shreyaa and beaming.

It made her feel kind of good, like he did it on purpose, like he liked her back, like it was a double crush.

But confused at the unexpected gesture, she takes a second more and says, “Umm, do you have this book ‘war and peace’ by Leo Tolstoy?”

“Umm, yes. But I can’t give it to you”, says Rabin in a funny tone.

She gets confused and a bit insecure by now. She talks fast,”sushma, your friend is from my class. She said you had the book so I came to you.”

“Well okay. But you should be very careful with my book. It’s very special to me, so.”,says he, in a way he means it.

“Sure, don’t worry.” says Shreyaa, settled to the situation by now.

He asks for her name and she gives him, showing her ID. “Bring it tomorrow, okayJ” says she and they say bye to each other with hands waved. She walks out of the room like a queen, with sushma joining her eager to know what happened.

to be continued…