518 Days of Sumer
Well, Give or Take
Summertime has always been a tricky time of year for me. As a child it was miserable because I was stuck with my abusive parents, and as a teenager it meant that the school year fling had ended but, either way it meant that I was left with alone with my broken heart. That sounds a bit melancholy on the birthday of my great nation so I’m sorry for that. I haven’t had a good Fourth in such a long time. Today didn’t break that streak either. But, I’m not heart broken this summer. I’m 22 and my world is starting to seem brighter.
I felt the need to write this because I just watching 500 Days of Summer for about the 1,000th time. Joseph Gordan Levitt was probably one of my first crushes that I can remember as a child. (Leonardo DiCaprio being the very first of course) I fell for him whilest watching 3rd Rock From the Sun. A real deal fan, right? Hahaha. But, the first time in my life I saw this movie differently.
I usually go to it in the midst of being heart broken but, like I said earlier, I’m not at the moment. Its easier to watch Romantic Comedies with an unbiased heart in the mix. When you’re in love you’re only going to see the good things and if you heart is broken you’ll only be able to see the bad. I realized when my ex boyfriend got married that I’m actually doing pretty well for myself at this point in my life. Praise the Lord because I would be down and out on my own. I’m not in love with anyone at the moment, or even interested to say the least. I was able to watch this cinematic masterpiece with an open mind.
Tom’s little sister seems to be his one confidant that he can turn to no matter what state of mind he may be in. She’s about 12 years old but speaks profound wisdom for her age. (Good work there, writers.) One of the last instances she’s seen on screen she tells poor broken hearted Tom that, as he dwells on his recent year with Summer, he’s only remembering the good which is the cause of his pain. I remember being in that place too. Only being able to remember the happy things and suppressing all the pain and red flags. I could relate to poor Tom so much this time around.
There’s also a part where Summer compares their decaying relationship to that of Sid Vicious and Nancy. She being Sid and Tom being Nancy. Which is really sad because for a while Tom is pinning it on himself, since he’s constantly trying to back track to the moment where he sees the first signs of trouble. I remember that feeling too. I don’t know why but this movie spoke to me much louder today than it ever has before. Which is really saying something since I’ve watched it dozens and dozens of times.
Finally, when poor Tom realizes that sometimes things just happen, a new season in his life is able to begin: Autumn. I can relate to this feeling too. Its funny how when you’re in the midst of so much pain it feels like its never going to end. But, that isn’t true of course. It begins to get easier to get out of bed again. Its not as painful to hear love songs on the radio. You’ll feel yourself starting to fall back into you used to be. We’re pretty fricken resilient as humans, aren’t we? Give yourself a pat on the back, humanity. We’re pretty fricken amazing. Anyway, my season of summer has finally ended without my noticing it and I feel (for the most part) pretty great about it. My new season is finally here and I’m loving every bit of it. No, a new dude hasn’t tried to sweep me up into his arms, get that one out of your head haha. Something new is coming though, I can feel it. I’m so excited.
So, hello, Autumn. It is so very nice to meet you.