I can’t bring myself to finish this stupid paper for this stupid class I’m taking to get a raise at my job. I wish I could make being a musician my profession. I love what I do and I love my students but, a deep part of my heart longs to play in front of an audience and connect with people in this way that no one else can.
I wish I could spend hours writing songs and collaborating with other musicians. I wish I had time and energy to take steps to get there. But, for whatever reason I’ve found myself in a new pit where this isn’t possible. I’m so tired all the time. The man got me. The thing that I’ve kicked and fought against my whole life has engulfed me. Or at least it feels that way.
I wanna get out of this little town that no one leaves. I want to travel the world. I want to meet new people. I want to learn new languages. I want my freedom. I want my dream.
I’m just not there yet.