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Many people like to call P. tetragonolobus a “one-stop grocery store,” but I’d rather call it Sylvester Stallone from Rambo: Last Blood. Please, step into my memory box. Do you remember that scene when Rambo shirtlessly flexed-down on hundreds of people with machine guns who wanted to murder him? Did you think to yourself, “no human can engage an army with a bow and arrow and prevail!” Well, when Rambo stoically surveyed his killing field of arrow-addled corpses, he grunted a fleeting acknowledgement to a bullet wound to his shoulder.
THAT was the Goa Bean standing on that hill: a monument to unachievable feats; a hulking caricature of what it means to be a real plant.
We are about to discuss a geometric freakazoid that provides seven edible uses: fresh pods, leaves, flowers, beans, roots, shoots, and oil. After this plant feeds an army of people, it will then feed all of the other plants in the vicinity because, you know, it hosts beneficial bacteria that can fix nitrogen like most legumes.
Now just look at your pathetic tomatoes. Why can’t they be more like P. tetragonolobus? Shame on them; shame on all of them.
Click here to learn more about the Goa Bean.
For more articles on unusual vegetables
By Kevin Healey 1/1/2018