Who Are The Pines?

Redux
6 min readAug 4, 2018

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By now you’ve all seen Jake Hanrahan’s article on Pine Tree Twitter, some were less than impressed, most were outright offended. But that begs the question, how did he get us so wrong? Whether it be a lack of research, or a malicious mischaracterization, I think it’s time we establish ourselves in writing. To be clear, I don’t claim to be a speaker for all Pines, this response is a reflection of my own thoughts on the topic. To that end I’ve sought input form a couple guys you all know and respect, Mike Ma and Storm King, both veterans of this side of Twitter. On the topic of the article itself, Mike had this to say:

“Whether Jake Hanrahan truly believes that the Pine Tree movement gained its footing on the back of a documentary series is irrelevant, because regardless, the movement still grows. Every day, the modern world beats down on many a man for the last time. If he’s truly meant to make it, he seeks the same route as we have. There’s nothing unreasonable about what we aspire to. A life of freedom reached through education and hard work in some remote forested area? An escape from the pollution and carnival attractions? A family raised away from the unnecessary horrors of today? A rewarding existence? These are things that you cannot actually argue against. For one, because they are time-tested ways to live. Two, because it’s none of your fucking business what we do, so long as we act within the confines of the legal system. When shit finally hits the fan, we’ll see who is better equipped for the world thereafter.”

I interviewed Storm King on some of the broader topics surrounding Pine Tree Twitter:

Q: Is Pine Tree Twitter the product of a Discovery Channel documentary on Netflix?

A: “No this shit came directly from Mena posting Ted years ago fuck Netflix Jake is an idiot”

Q: What is Pine Tree Twitter to you?

A: “Pine tree twitter is a community of people tired of living in industrial shit world who want to return to a more holistic way of life free from the cage and closer to nature by whatever means.”

Q: Is Pine Tree Twitter indicative of a larger movement, or just shitposters online?

A: “PTT (Pine Tree Twitter) is just one aspect of the emerging force that is the rise of neo technoskepticism.”

Q: Although many pines have disagreements, do we have a core set of values that define us?

A: “I would say our core set of values is against globohomo technoslavery and for the earth and family”

Q: How would you respond to people who would call an eco centric movement on an online platform hypocritical?

A: “I’d say they are retards who haven’t read the literature and don’t understand that part of this project has to happen in the online political space.”

Powerful words from powerful men. It’s clear that Pine Tree Twitter means much more to us than a TV show and a folder full of “SHUT THE FUCK UP URBANITE” memes. So how do we articulate this to those outside our circles? The first step must be to clearly define ourselves, and where we’re headed.

Who are we?

A question that can sometimes be difficult for even us to answer, who exactly are the Pines, and what do they believe? While there are many disagreements on the finer details of ecology and technocapital society within our ranks, we all share a core set of principles that have guided us here in one way or another. The first and most important being that we all see an issue with the way the world is today. Massive corporations, “capital,” own governments and do what they please at the expense of the worker and the Planet. Deforestation, massive pollution, Global climate change, ultra-processed foods, endocrine disrupting chemicals present in almost everything you eat or drink, it can be maddening. Every device you own tracks your habits in one way or another, with either capital or the government listening in. Artificial wombs, cloning, genetic editing, and open transhumanism stand poised to change what it means to be human, in the worst way possible. Every device or invention dreamed up and produced serves in part or in whole to further the atomization of humanity. Were slowly and willingly being hollowed out into a shell of a person, regurgitating the same lines were told to, consuming the same media as everyone else, becoming a carbon copy of every other person. These are things we all recognize as huge issues. We long to return to a more organic way of life, one in the intimate bond between man and nature is restored. A simple life, a good life, a life worth living. In the end I feel that what we all truly wish is to be left alone. The rigors of Industrial society push themselves on us constantly. We are bombarded with woke capitals attempts to mold us into “consumer/producer unit #12384.” We chose to stand against this manipulation, even if its solely at a personal level. We chose to put the planet, our home, in front of empty consumerism. We believe that the way to truly live a good life is to disconnect and live like people again. We refuse to be ground into the relentless global favela that capital so desperately wants us all to reside in, stripped of our identities, robbed of our connection to the Earth. If we’re keeping with the current political trends, we can be summed up in the tagline “Make People Human Again.”

Why are we Here?

This is a question with many answers, so I’ll share my personal reasons as to why I’m here tweeting into the void, and of course speculate as to why all of my peers are as well. First and foremost, I’ve always had an intimate connection with nature. From that first backpack my father took me on at 6 years old, I’ve been hooked. Since then I’ve developed my personal beliefs, deepend my love and connection to this beautiful planet, and of course read the manifesto. I suspect most of us have had a similar development curve. But why Twitter? Its no secret that social media is a powerful networking tool, It will probably be cited in the history books as facilitating perhaps the most miraculous presidential election in history, our experience is no different. To be in communication with so many intelligent individuals allows us to grow and develop our ideas into something feasible. Many of us are taking real world measures to break out, and live a truly holistic life. But perhaps most vitally of all, we come for the friends. Most of us don’t have people in our lives who we can relate this kind of thinking to. And so we come on Twitter to bant, shoot the shit, and generally have a good time. Having a core group of like minded individuals to talk to helps ease the burden the world has placed on our shoulders. We see that we’re far from alone, and that our suffering is shared. While there’s important work to be done, we will absolutely have a good time doing it.

Where are we Headed?

It bears repeating that the true focus of our endeavors here hinge on self-determination, being left alone. With that goal in mind, the only option left to us is to disconnect and bug out. Some Pines dream of a communal compound, tucked away from the war being waged against humanity in the hell we call cities. Others look to a more personal goal of securing a plot of land for themselves and their families, to live a simple life in balance with the world around them. Environmentalism as it exists in a liberal frame is impotent to its core. It’s a fad taken up by bourgeois busy bodies with too much time on their hands. They never want to see real change, they’d rather sport their newest 40 dollar tote bag reading “think green!” brought to them by some Milesian child working a 12 hour shift in a sweatshop. The left has coopted and destroyed any chance of meaningful conservation, and the right is more than happy to throw a pack of straws into the nearest body of water to “own” them. Most pines agree that it would take a complete collapse of modern society, brought about either internally or via ecological disaster, to hit the hard reset and save what remains of humanity. Given that a collapse of this magnitude is unlikely to happen in our lives, we must look to “collapse now and avoid the rush.” Begin growing some of your own food, fix up your own homes, go out into nature and sharpen your skills, do anything you can to increase your own self-sufficiency. When the opportunity to escape presents itself, grab onto it with the confidence that you’ve prepared yourself to live a natural lifestyle. This is the best course of action left to us.

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