In Defense of Uber

Correcting the Record

Lord Socks
Mar 3, 2017 · 2 min read

Dear Internet,

Recently, it has come to my attention that a company in my investment portfolio, Uber, has come under attack. As one of Uber’s more significant shareholders, I believe I have a moral responsibility to stand up for what’s right and correct the record.

Shame on Us All

By now, I’m sure that you’ve seen the video in which Uber CEO Travis Kalanick treated an Uber driver disrespectfully. To say that I am ashamed is an extreme understatement.

However, the situation is out of my control. If I could help, I would, but I am going to make a lot of money from Uber’s eventual public offering.

I don’t want to look “founder-unfriendly” over something no one cares about, like institutionalized abuse of women and the poors.

My job as an investor is to provide thought leadership…and that starts with behaving in a way that makes us all proud. That is not what I’m doing in this case, and I’d like to explain that away: I’ll do it when I feel like it, and I just don’t feel like it right now.

Bitches Ain’t Nothing But Hos and Tricks

It’s clear that the scale and types of allegations of misconduct at Uber are a reflection of the terrible culture at that company and in Silicon Valley in general. The criticism Travis has received is a stark reminder that we all have to do a better job of not hiring women or minorities, because all they do is whine.

I will, though, take responsibility for my part in making Silicon Valley a bad place to be either of those types of people I mentioned earlier but which now slip my mind.

I promise to fundamentally change as a leader and grow up, despite being the equivalent of 40 years old in human years.

I Am Super Humble

This is the first time I’ve been willing to admit that I need leadership help, and I intend to get it, as long as it comes from coaches who will never, ever criticize or contradict me.

I want to profoundly apologize to anyone Uber has hurt, as well as the driver and rider community, and to the Uber team. But not to the women who complained to HR — you cunts are dead to me.

— LS

Lord Socks

Written by

Leadership expert. Angel investor. Beast Zuckerberg is my bitch. Email me: putasockinit13 [AT]

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