I am not here for anyone else

Being my true self unapologetically…

Unfortunately after so many years of brain washing, people in today’s world are still residing in the home of ignorance. We are in a world where the older generations constantly hold onto the social and societal conditioning that have been past on year after year. With this comes parents who can’t understand their children, society who wants to shut them out, and the experience of being labeled a “rebel” or “problematic”.

Let’s step back for a minute.

The generation of the millennial has been wildly criticized, especially by parents. One thing that the older generation (not all of generation X because some clearly understand that we are parallel to them in many ways) can’t seem to grasp is that you create your own destiny. No one can decide who you are going to be but you. Not even your parents. You are going to be who you are, unapologetically. You are so concerned with your own path, growth, and well being that you don’t have time to worry about what offends or angers people. You understand that a persons reaction and/or feeling has nothing to do with anyone but them. For many of our parents; they are just doing what they were taught and for some reason, don’t feel that they exist in this category.

Growing up, there were a lot of things that just didn’t make sense to me. So as I got older, I started to figure things out for myself. I realized that no one’s journey is like the next persons. I wanted to have my own journey. Of course, I was labeled as the “rebel” because I didn’t just listen to what my mom told me, especially if it didn’t make sense. I didn’t just agree if I truly disagreed. I wanted to know more. I didn’t want to just listen to what someone told me and go with that. I wanted to have a mind of my own and I did. I did things my own way and created a safe space for myself to be me. For a long time I felt that I wasn’t able to truly be me.

“You’re a reflection of me”

No, I am a reflection of my spirit.

“You didn’t think about how that would make me feel?”

No, because I do not adhere to anyone else’s feelings or perceptions.

“You’re reputation is everything”

No, your true self is everything.

I strongly believe growing up with a family that was so concerned with image has made me not concerned with it at all. What can YOU do about what people think about you? Put on an act? Be something you’re truly not?I have no desire to be anything or anyone other than myself. I am ok with whatever is lost in the process because better will come. I am also ok with even those close to me not understanding me. I was meant to be misunderstood; I am understood by those capable of reaching the heights of my vibration.

Lies are no longer comforting, my truth is.

I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter how old you are, your age is just the number of years you’ve been on this earth. That doesn’t mean that you’ve accelerated as a person or that you’ve actually been learning anything. There are 20 year olds that happen to be more aware than 40 year olds. Just because you are of an older age does not mean your automatically equipped. There are people who haven’t had their awakening yet and are in their 50s. I’m just blessed enough by my Orishas to be able to have my awakening at the tender age of 19.

If I really sit and think about my life, I’ve done good. I am happy with who I am. I know that I can not change how people feel about me or what I do and that isn’t my concern. I am my concern. That is it.

I love myself more than I love anybody else in this world. I care for myself before caring for anybody. I think about my own well-being before i can think about anyone else’s.

And that’s self love…

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