I Attempted Suicide. I’m Still Alive to Talk About It.
Nandini Chandra
111

hello nandini…i feel like helping you…listening and talking to you…please do hit me up on gmail if you feel like talking…you never know how i might make a small difference in your life and vice-versa…n i would quite like that (if you made a difference in my life tyvm)….i don’t know what to say…it’s such a sensitive and brave thing you’ve done to share your feelings….i am in a place where there are two extremes…one is death and the other is self realisation and i’ve to make small but important choices every day…to decide the direction i am taking….life’s long man…there are many fragrances left to take in…many delicious meals to be had…genuine friendships are possible…a lot of sex to be had haha…lot of after work out ‘feel goodness’ that you can experience should you choose…you did the right thing…if you’ve seen inside out i am guessing ‘sadness’ becomes more powerful..to think is to be…the battle is within..plz do that..win it in within…anyway…i’ll share something too…i have a family that i visit sometimes…i stay over and just like to hear them talk …to hear them discuss school n college…the mother listening to her kids and arguing and tending to them….the way they go about it….it’s like music for my ears (and soul)….i am sick of the fake good will people project…n i say it with thought, girls are a lot worse than guys in this regard….there however….there is no projection…it’s the real thing…nobody is trying to remind or show how well meaning they are…they just are…it’s explicit in whatever they do…it’s just there.….there it feels like i am a battle weary soldier who’s getting back in the bliss of home…even when they’re arguing…they’re kind n beautiful…there’s no harshness in their voice…it’s all sweet….melodious…..n i could just lay back…take a deep breath …breathe a sigh positively….and close my eyes and hear them talk and ..heal…it’s my happy place…i wish we could spend more time…but life…society…ambitions and practicalities…anyway…what i can do with you is share and listen…i mean to offer to contribute in your life…one of the biggest regrets i have in life is that i was never honest to myself…i was so busy living with the protective mask on …the charade…that i never actually was honest to myself…if i’d had someone i could just feel completely safe…it would have been so easy….but now rather than hoping to ‘lean on’..i try to ‘lean in’ first…anyway…the biggest gift i can offer you is that you can talk and lean on me a little bit for a little while terms n conditions apply for a small fee with accruing interest…in any case…be honest…let it hurt and you will find within god’s bountiful force of life…

One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.