Quincy Gunderson
Aug 25, 2017 · 4 min read

You can’t scare me. I played football for Coach Jesse Parker.


If you’re fortunate, at some point during your education you’ll have at least one teacher who will not only do their best to thoroughly educate you about their subject, but also challenge you to examine how you think. I was fortunate enough to have a teacher like that, one who taught history by encouraging his students to critically examine the historical figures and events his lessons covered, to look for the fallible flesh-and-blood humanity of the people caught up in historical events, and to respect the sacrifices of those that came before us. That teacher was also my football coach. He was not just any football coach, either, but one destined to win several Arizona state championships by getting every ounce of determination and effort out of whatever talents his players possessed. That coach honed his players’ skills by demanding adherence to a standard of perfection achieved through seemingly endless repetition. Through both of these roles, Coach Jesse Parker taught by employing and embodying a stoic code. If you knew that coach, sooner or later you heard the words of Marcus Aurelius.


“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive — to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” — Marcus Aurelius

Daily exposure to a crazy-scary, intimidating, whip-smart, tough-as-nails coach challenges young people. The take-no-prisoners and take-no-BS attitude of such a coach requires young people to check their egos, or pay a price. Not all young people find this ego adjustment to be easy or pleasant, but most do adjust, perhaps thanks to having to pay the price, which usually involved lots of running. The no-nonsense environment encouraged many of these young people to exceed their own expectations, and to deal with failure through perseverance and hard work. Hard work never guaranteed victory, but was a fact of life that one might as well accept, if not embrace.


“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” — Marcus Aurelius

No whining, no complaining, no excuses. Do it right or do it again. The repetition could be maddening. The demand for perfect execution could feel like torture. You probably think about quitting at some point, and you probably hate the taskmaster driving you, pushing the limits of your endurance. Sometimes you wonder if the purpose is to find your breaking point. The endless striving for impossible perfection might break you, too… but if it does break you, it will also remake you. If you survive, you’ll be a better, wiser, stronger person. You’ll refuse to quit even when the odds are stacked against you and losing seems inevitable. If nothing else, you’ll know you went down swinging and your opponent will know they were in a knock-down, drag-out fight. Your opponent will know they earned their victory. You will know that you left everything you had on the field. You’ll get tougher. You will transform yourself into a force to be reckoned with, and you won’t be easy to intimidate.


“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” — Marcus Aurelius

It’s an essential aspect of education to teach a respectful, but still critical, perspective toward our history. It can be easy, and very tempting, to mythologize our ancestors, but when we do so we elevate them to a kind of superhuman status and lose or at least diminish our sense of being related or connected to them. It can seem impossible that we might endure the struggles our predecessors overcame, especially if our predecessors don’t quite seem like imperfect people. A true understanding of our history requires us to acknowledge that there are no perfect people, but also that imperfect people are capable of doing perfect things.


“If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.” — Marcus Aurelius.

Coach Parker’s legacy endures through the thousands of lives he touched and young people he taught. I am eternally grateful for his influence on me, and consider myself fortunate to be but one soldier in the army he built. Carry on, Coach.


You can’t scare me. I was taught by Coach Jesse Parker.

Coach Jesse Parker passed away on July 21, 2017. You can learn more about Coach Jesse Parker at: https://coachjesseparker.squarespace.com/blog/

-qzg

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