Sorry for the weird formatting. I’ve inserted a pdf below.
Adam was hunched over on his cell sending messages to someone, smiling at each one
received. His friend, meanwhile, paced the living-room. It was Friday. He was over that day
once a week, usually to talk over drinks and drink over talking, joking around about the things
he would like to do, but never will. He was pensive, searching himself for answers to what he
himself could not conclude. He was always pensive, but more today than usual. Adam glanced
up at him once every while, but continued to text and smile at his phone. His friend, after a
couple more rotations around the living-room, stopped pacing, and broke silence.
“I don’t know what I want to do.”
Adam looked up from the couch. A slight frown befell his face for a sliver of a second.
“Hold on right quick,” he replied. He took a minute, looking at his phone once again before
shutting it off; and, after smiling one last time, put it down to give attention to his friend.
“Alright, what’s up now?”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“About what, Felix?”
“Well, I like a girl.”
“Oh.”
“My feelings have grown for her lately.”
“I’m assuming she’s the one you vaguely brought up a few months ago. Something
about how you didn’t know how you should approach a girl you wanted to talk to.” Adam knew
who she was, even if Felix wanted to be vague.
“Yeah, she’s the one. I didn’t think I’d tell you, but I’m tearing myself up inside.”
“She…” Adam began to say, but was quickly interrupted by his friend who was
entranced in thought.
“I want to ask her out. I know I have nothing to lose, but is that really true? What if we
end up going out and I fall in love?” They were answerless questions: shouts into the void. Felix
initially retracted his breath to finish, but quickly rebounded with an answer of his own. “If we
do go out, we’ll eventually break up. And at that point, I’ll have lost a friend and a lover.”
Adam thoughtfully nodded his head, considering the response he received. He couldn’t
collect any words to say. He thought over what Felix said. And there was a moment of silence
before the two spoke.
“But you know Adam, you know I would hate if she rejected me.”
“Then why even think about asking in the first place?”
“I don’t know.”
“You need to stop thinking.”
Felix glared at Adam incredulously. “It’s hard.”
“No one said it would be easy.”
“No one said it would be hard.”
“Then don’t think about it.”
Felix leaned forward almost tauntingly. Adam knew he only escalated what was now
tension with what he had said, and knew if nothing was done to abate his insecure friend soon,
the conversation could become slanderous, as it had sometimes come close to being in the
past. After looking down in more thought, he had a response to his afflicted friend. It wasn’t
calming, but it was better than being just that. He knew Felix would have to face a harsh reality
either route he took. After looking down in more thought, he said to his friend “Everyone is
here to teach us something.” He looked up into Felix’ eyes. “Everyone who comes into our lives
is here to teach us something, whether that person exits our lives at some point, and whether
we loved them.”
“Yeah, how well that’s turned out.” Adam said nothing. His friend put his head down
and frowned. He continued in irritation. “To teach us something, huh? Well how fantastic this
insecurity feels. Is this something I learned myself, or did I learn this because of others? See,
this is why I’m afrai-”
“Both,” Adam interjected. “Mama always said it takes two to tango.”
“Well, I don’t get to choose the way my life operates. I’d say from day one I’ve been part
of a tango with people in which I’ve had no control of my movements.”
And Adam, choosing his words wisely in the short silence that followed, said this: “But, if
we had no one to tango with, we would be in anguish pretty much all the time.”
His friend looked up at him and grinned. “You’re so god damned corny, you know that? I mean
really, the tango?”
“Hey man,” Adam countered playfully yet seriously, “I’ll teach your limp-legged ass how
to tango, but first I think I should teach you how to walk.”
The two laughed.
My family’s been…”
“…tango dancers for generations,” Felix apathetically finished. “God, do you have
anything to say to me less lame?”
Felix hadn’t noticed her until a couple weeks into the previous semester. English class. She was
that girl who sat in the back corner of the classroom never talking to anyone, letting her
idiosyncrasies gleam through unknowingly. She was silently beautiful. The day he noticed her
was the day she came late into class.
“Okay, stay in your assigned seats while I take roll so I know who’s here. After that, you
can move to where you want to sit.” The teacher mumbled to herself the names of students,
scratching them off the roster as she did. Then, she called “Triche. Triche? Is Triche here?”
Just when she was about to mark the name off, the door flung open as an out-of-breath
girl appeared in its frame. “Here.”
That was the first time he saw her. He began to watch her walk into each class.
Notwithstanding the silent beauty he came to so much admire, the first thing to captivate Felix
when she first stood in that doorway was something else–her eyes–and since, he would turn
his head during class to look at them. She had wonderful green eyes. When the sun touched
day just right, a translucent hue of yellow appeared radiant over them. And each day, he found
something more to admire.
Those days of secretly admiring her in class were over. The semester finished. A new
one had begun. Felix saw her at lunch one day in the cafeteria. He never talked to her when
they had English together, but the cafeteria was more opportune a place. “Conversation will
come more naturally,” he thought. He seized his moment.
“Heyyy,” he nervously said while managing an awkward smile, “how did English go for
you last semester?”
Startled, her face softened once she recognized him. She replied in pleasant surprise. “Oh,
hey!
Felix! Yeah, it was good. The final was a cakewalk. ”
“Yeah,” Felix chuckled. “It was.”
They got on like that. And one month went by they started talking. Then two. And they
began to meet every lunch. She would come late, but that didn’t bother Felix. Then three
months. And he could make her laugh now, and she would say “You’re a really great guy, Felix.”
And it was the fourth month. A week had gone by–the same week of the talk with Adam about
asking a girl out and falling in love. Felix took that week to think. He was a doubtful man. He
liked to think “What if?” and simulate the worst case scenarios. But in all his doubt and anxiety,
Adam helped him through, even if unsympathetic. So, Felix thought to thank him. He wished to
do so before asking out Triche, but hadn’t heard from Adam since having talked to him. He tried
texting, no response. Then calling. No response. Felix did not want to talk to Triche until he
could thank Adam. Then, it came to mind the only time his friend was certain to be home. It
was Friday. And that day, he drove to Adam’s before asking Triche out at lunch.
On the drive over, Felix thought, “Tango, huh. What a laugh, but what a goddamned
help.” And he also thought ” If Triche says yes, I wonder what I should tell her. Should I say: I
would not have been able to do this if it was not for a helpful friend?” Felix hadn’t told Adam
her name. But once she said yes, hopefully she would say yes, Felix knew Adam would
recognize her. It would be a pleasant surprise. They were once in the same English group
together for a project.
He arrived. It was a beautiful afternoon, and the sun hit day just right. A smile wrapped
around his face as he walked up to the front door. It was cracked open, and he could hear the
sound of music playing. He opened it. The smile quickly vanished. He fell in silent agony. There
before him was a girl with eyes a radiant yellow, in the arms of a helpful friend, dancing the
tango.
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