twenty1.

Yes, you guessed right! Today is my 21st birthday. The truth is, there isn’t this magic switch that happens when the clock strikes midnight; like in the Cinderella story where she rushed home before she turned back into a normal girl. I am the same person two days before my birthday versus the minute I turn 21 years old.

One of the main factors that everyone puts focus on when turning 21 is the excitement of finally being legal to drink alcohol. Yes, I enjoy relaxing and drinking wine with friends, my personal favorite is Duplin muscadine white wine. (p.s. Duplin is probably the best inexpensive bottle of wine coupled with a sweet & rich finish) Okay back to the original topic. Personally, for me, the main factor of turning 21 is preparing myself for the added responsibilities and choices that I now have to make. I am entering adulthood, a new found freedom. Not only will I begin this day with a new mindset, but a new outlook on life as well.

For my 21st birthday, I decided to share a blog post sharing pieces of advice to my younger self. Please feel free to share any advice written below to inspire and uplift others. Here we go!

Love & Relationships

• Before you attempt to love anyone else you must first love yourself. Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.
• Be patient and don’t force romantic relationships. In the meantime, tend to your garden by nurturing your wilted parts.
• Know your worth, then add tax! (tax=standards) Never comprise your integrity by feeding people who just want a plate to go, not everybody deserves access to you.
• Instead of trying to find the love of your life, become it! The more you fill yourself with love, the more you can give to others.
• Never regret the people or places you found love, even if they were incapable of reciprocating. You will experience a share of pain and heartbreaks. These dark times will teach you a lot and will mold you into the strong, resilient force that I am today. (p.s. writing this definitely brought me to tears)

Friendships

• Align yourself with people who support your growth, make you happy and feed your soul — those who don’t — send them love and move right along.
• Newfound happiness exposes weak friendships. You will lose a lot of people when you are focusing on yourself. Don’t feel sorry for evolving.
• Knowing the difference between who to cut off and who to be patient with is everything.
• You can’t force someone to comprehend a message that they are not yet ready to receive, but never underestimate the power of planting a seed.
• Cherish those that have remained by your side through thick and thickest. Enjoy every friendship and embrace the ending. Be thankful for the experience and then let go.

Self-Motivation & Inspiration

• The greatest prison you can live in is the fear of what other people think. Remember, your value doesn’t decrease based on others inability to see your worth.
• Give up your need to be perfect! It is not your job to be perfect; it is your job to share your unique gifts and your love. In doing so, you will inspire others.
• Everything to which you give energy to will develop in some way. What you nurture is what will grow and what you allow is what will continue.
• You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is sitting back and observing everything with logic; true power is restraint.
• Don’t be so hard on yourself. Take a moment to sit back and marvel at life. At the grief that softened you, the heartache that wisened you, and the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this. ❤
• How do you find happiness? You don’t, it finds YOU. Your job is to simply make room for when it shows up. — Alex Elle