Watermelons, I believe that’s what they call “us”. Green on the outside, red on the inside. I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be a derogatory term, though. These days, most terms in the media mentioning (or implying), “red” or “left” or “socialist” are meant in a derogatory sense, so it probably is. Plus, the “on the inside” bit is suggestive that we’re trying to hide our red credentials below an outward facing green facade. Anyway, I’m happy to be both red and green. I was trying to find a more appropriate fruit, and dragon fruit seemed like a good candidate, all red and spiny with green tips to the spines, but then the insides are all white with black speckles, and I’m not really sure what that might represent.

[buzzzzz] “deviation!”

Anyway, yes, so I’ve cancelled my Labour Party membership and signed up to the Green Party. It felt quite a big/emotional decision, as whilst I had never been a remotely active member of the party, I had always considered myself a Labour supporter, like it was in my blood. In fact, I kind of supported the Labour Party before I even really knew what political parties, or government, or elections really were. At an early age my uncle gave me a badge that said “Tories help the rich, Labour help the rest” and I thought, “well, they sound nice then, because the rich don’t really need people helping them”, and I was sold.

Of course, being born in 1977 it did mean that I spent most of my early days growing up under Thatcher, which, if the badge hadn’t been enough, taught me all I needed to know about the Tories. So, yes, Labour were the party for me. Each general election I was devastated that the Tories won again, and couldn’t understand why people kept voting for them. Even at primary school I got into arguments with people about how horrible the Tories were.

Finally, 1997, and the first general election I got to vote in, and Labour won! “Things could only get better!”.

And things did get better, and I can’t deny they were better than the Tories, but I did not like this Tony Blair fellow, and then there were the lies, and the wars, and the sucking up to big business and the Murdochs. This wasn’t the Labour Party I’d grown up to believe in. But they were still better than the Tories. Still so much better.

So, I kept voting for them at general elections. I was so cross about Blair’s wars and lies, though, that in European and local elections I’d throw the occasion “protest vote” out to another party. I definitely voted Socialist Alternative one time, and I think Greens another, and possibly even Lib Dem, though I can’t be sure.

Then Brown finally came in, and maybe he would be better, he was always pitched as going to be better (if you were a Leftie). Obviously he was completely useless with the media, but I actually quite liked that about him. And people complained that he was a control freak, but I’m accused of the same, so I couldn’t begrudge him that. People also accused him of things that you would think would be good qualities in a prime minister, like seeming too intelligent — umm, you want a dumb prime minister? Then, of course, the economy collapsed, which was all his fault for too much public spending, and not saving in the boom years, he spent so much it collapsed economies around the globe, no matter their economic leanings. Though I was being sarcastic just then, it actually was partially his fault for some reasons, like his crazy PFI schemes and lack of control of the financial sector, and not bringing back other sectors so that the economy didn’t rely entirely on moving numbers around, but the press seldom point out these failings.

So, “Labour crashed the economy”, there was a general election, and that was that (after a very exciting few days of speculation), and we got lumbered with this Conservative and Lib Demo coalition, and it’s been just fucking terrible for the country, and even the things they say they achieved through their “necessary” austerity have failed to come close to their targets. They’re a complete shambles, and they’re more in the pocket of big business than any government before, they give not the slightest shit about anyone they deem to be below them (which is most people), and they make Tony Blair seem like the genuinely honest and straight forward kind of guy he always claimed to be.

The Tories have taken a massive leap further to the right, and have dragged the lib dems with them, yet some people don’t feel even that is enough, so we also have UKIP out Thatchering everyone else whist pretending to be everyday normal people with a pint [glug-glug].

All of this has opened up a massive void on the left, ready for “Red Ed” to leap in and fill. BUT HE’S DONE NOTHING OF THE SORT, AND THIS IS WHERE I START TO GET REALLY CROSS!!

Yes he’s a bit weird and awkward and can’t eat bacon sandwiches and decides to do speeches from memory and forgets to mention the word “deficit” (which then gets blown up into “Miliband forgets about the economy” — though, less mention in all the news that Cameron forgot he’d already told his “paying down the debt” lie, and had already been called out on it), but I don’t care about any of those faults. What I care about is that he’s just triangulating so frantically when he should be hauling the party back to the left. I really feel that that is where his heart lies, but that his heart is unfortunately pathetically weak, and so he just pussyfoots around in the middle-(which is quite far right now)-ground of politics, and throws out a few token gestures towards the left like an energy price freeze (when people want renationalisation), a NHS budget rise (which just about equations to a rise in inflation), and a Mansion Tax (rather than a sensible re-writing of council tax).

And then he does crap like posing awkwardly with a World Cup edition of The Sun, or crap like talking tough on immigration and Europe because (to paraphrase) “the people have spoken and it’s what they want” (though, 6 times as many people didn’t “speak” at all as voted for UKIP), and I just want to slap his stupid face.

[deep breaths]

Yes, so basically I had kept waiting and waiting for Labour to show me any hint that they were worth voting for, and they just failed to again and again and again.

So, I gave up on waiting.

At the same time, I started to read more about the Green Party. I’d considered the Greens in the past, as I knew they had good social policies, and also because I really do care a lot about the environment (my brother had told me about the greens ages ago — possibly when he first got to vote — and it all sounded very good, but he was my brother, so I had to disagree). However, last time I looked I had been really put off by two factors. One was their ridiculous stance on homeopathy, which they have since given the boot, and the other was their stance on nuclear. Now, I still am to be convinced that we can reduce our carbon emissions quickly enough without relying on nuclear, but, I also thought that having just one policy that I disagree with (even though I think it’s a key one) is actually still pretty good.

There was also one other thing that helped me make my mind up, and that was the Scottish independence referendum. Initially I had been full against it, because I felt it would doom us with endless Tory governments, but I then realised that it was a bit selfish to make the Scottish suffer a single extra Tory government just to protect us from ourselves every few years, but, also, because I learnt that the Scottish vote has only decided the outcome of the UK election very few times and for very short periods.

When I got over that fear, I then became more aware of all the positives of the Yes campaign and the negatives of the No campaign. People voting Yes and campaigning for Yes were voting yes and campaigning for yes in hope of something better, a hope of an escape from all this crap. Yet, the No vote was all based on fear, fear that things may get worse. The whole no campaign seemed based on scaring people about the “risks” of independence. It wasn’t about all the greatness and benefits of being in the UK, and about how wonderful it all is — even Cameron couldn’t quite work out how to tell that lie. The best they came up with for hope on the No front was saying if people voted No they’d give them a few extra powers as a conciliation prize, that they’d treat them better in the future, like an abused spouse being begged to stay.

So, the positive energy and grassroots campaigning of the Yes campaign filled me with this strange feeling of hope and excitement around politics. I really wanted people to vote yes, I wanted them to take the risk, not to just stick with the known because it was somehow safer. Then, of course, all that hope and optimism was crushed. Then I thought, no, even in losing they achieved something, it might not have been what they wanted, but they still made a difference, and they still rocked some boats and ruffled some feathers along the way.

Now, it’s highly likely that the next election will be even closer than the last one, and with Labour and the Tories being so close, and the Lib Dem vote being nowhere to be seen, and UKIP possibly actually going to find enough stupid people clustered closely enough together to win them some seats, and with the SNP riding high in Scotland whilst Labour have left them all feeling betrayed, it’s more than possible that even a Con/Lib or a Lab/Lib coalition won’t have a majority.

Basically, Labour need every vote they can get in order to win the next election, and being in a seat that swung from Labour to Tory last time, they possibly need my vote more than others.

Well, tough. Tough shit. Sorry, if you want my vote you’ve had the last 4 fucking years to give me a reason you should get it, and you have failed miserably to do so, but have managed to give me reason after reason why you just don’t deserve it.

Now, I don’t want the Tories to win, they are utter shits, and have done enough damage, and need to be stopped, but I just can’t bring myself to vote for one party just to keep another party out, because then we’re never going to get anywhere, and they’ll just slowly keep dragging each other a little further to the right election after election.

The Tories shouldn’t win because they only represent the interests of, at best, about 10% of the population. If enough of that remaining 90% are stupid enough to vote for them, then it doesn’t feel like it should really be my job to stop them. Labour simply don’t deserve to win because they’re a shambles. They should easily be able to get into a position so they can walk home with the next election, but they can barely scrape a lead in the polls, and have even slipped behind in a few recently.

Now, I don’t for one minute imagine that the Green party will win more than one or two seats at the next election, and certainly not the one that I will be voting in, but if they can just increase their share of the vote in each seat, if they can double it or better, I feel it will start something, that it will start things moving. I also, importantly, think that after this election it will be harder than ever for parliament to defend our ridiculously outdated and undemocratic ‘First Past the Post’ voting system (which I think is only used by Azerbaijan out of all other countries in Europe, and there aren’t many more in the rest of the world that use it — so, next time a politician tells you proportional representation is too confusing for voters, just remember they’re saying you’re more stupid than most of the rest of the world), and it will be more difficult still if there are more minority parties getting a larger share of the vote yet getting very few, or no, seats (ironically, the Lib Dems actually stand to benefit from the system they have campaigned against, as they will likely get more seats than UKIP on a smaller share of the vote — and the SNP now look set to benefit even more than the Lib Dems).

Anyway, I’m over 2000 words now, and am not sure I actually really ever got to a point. Basically though, I feel let down by Labour, and I don’t feel they deserve my vote, I feel people should vote for what they believe is right, and if they wish things were better they should vote for a party they think would make things better. People should put hope above fear, and if they want change, they should vote for something they think would produce change, not stick with the slightly nicer side of the status quo. We also shouldn’t go on forever just accepting the broken electoral system we have by playing by its rules of tactical voting, which just hides the true extent to which the system is not fit for purpose.

This really has ended up longer than I thought it would, and I haven’t even really got onto anything about what I think is wrong with the way this country is run, or how I think it could be better, and why I feel the Green Party currently are the best aligned with that, so, I’ll hopefully write more soon.