I’m okay with all the pain. Said no heart ever.

I could never sleep in a room like this.

The photographs on the wall constantly remind me of how the times back then were so much better than today. How can I just close my eyes without trying to relive those moments; when there prevailed ecstasy and satisfaction? Although the present ain’t as bitter as death, the mind won’t surrender to not devaluing my current being.

Agreeing to the fact that I have been extremely unproductive lately, I recollect every single failure I faced after an ephemeral phase of joy. As a tear rolls down my cheek, I can literally hear my heart breaking into several pieces of inferiority, lack of confidence and demotivation.

Sleep won’t greet me anytime soon. How I wish I could fall asleep before I fall apart.

Tired of this vicious cycle revolving around photographs and comparisons between the past and present, I just lay there, with emptiness all around, as well as within me.

Despite all this mess, the Disney in me won’t rest.

“Conceal. Don’t feel” , I say to myself continuously.

As time passes, the night fades away with the receding pain. The following morning, I wake up with positivity as always, unknown to the challenges the next 24 hours hold for me.

Back in time, right this moment and into the further, those memories were, are and will always be magically frozen in time, locked within a special treasure of pure happiness.

-rachana 💘

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