So Glad We’re Friends

Hey Shawn, adulting is hard. Grab me by the tail. Do your fucking Fifth Step so you can fucking do me.

Hey Shawn, do you like being the poster child for resistance? Like the Canadian broadcaster said? Listen to track seven again. Listen to it closely.

What happened to him happened to me — it was beautiful. It was the most beautiful thing in the world, becoming One.

It lasted three days before it took me out of the atmosphere. The hemispheres of my brain were like the hemispheres of the earth, no longer split but merged into one world. We are all citizens of the World, you know. We live in a special time of timelessness.

I was flying before I flew away. I was watching the flight. I was watching myself write the flight down on paper. I was a kite with a pen in one hand and sponsees in the other.

Good thing for the Ativan, right? Good thing for friends, right? Good thing for a Tribe to hold you by the strings of your tail before you enter outer space.

Shawn, don’t be afraid of outer space. Don’t be afraid to let go of resistance. I’m not talking about sex or me or us. I’m talking about feeling trapped.

I used to live with a pimp, who never pimped to me out. He was obsessed with image insecurity and money. He was the doctor. He was obsessed with control…it was a covert operation.

He was obsessed with his covertly controlling operation. He was also abscessed with it. The control was a symptom of the wounds he never wanted to heal.

I used to live with a pimp who wanted me to sit still. It made him feel better, it made him less anxious, it made him less jealous, it allowed him to read his favorite medical books.

I used to be owned by a pimp…until the day I wasn’t. It took a village to rescue a woman enslaved to a boy. It took a Tribe to teach me about The Tribe. I had too much guilt to teach myself The Truth.

Hey Shawn, your day will come. I promise. You’ll remember how to be a master escape artist. You’ll heal the past to feel free in the present.

Hey Shawn, you’re day will come. You’re a man enslaved to a girl. The villagers will remind you that your arms work just fine.

I had too much guilt to teach myself The Truth. Shame and self-hate. “I’m shit.” The Tribe undoes these historical doings. Hysterical feelings are always historical doings. The doings are always undone in the Present. They are always undone with the Steps.

The Tribe is gentle and kind. It never imposes It’s way. It simply watches Itself unfold. The villagers should replicate the Spirit of The Tribe as best they can, but people have their own paces and special places on the Mountain.

I like watching you unfold, Shawn. It’s like watching a miracle…because you Are. I like that we hike at the same pace. It’s nice to have some company.

I make sure all my friends know they have a Tribe in me. I have so many kite tales. Tales of miraculous forgiveness. Wayne has many, too. Like the man who forgave his colleague for stealing $2,000,000. Like the daughter who forgave her dad for raping her. Like the son who forgave his mom for being a rabbit.

Rachel, how can a man be born of a rabbit? What is there to forgive?

When we forgive the brokenness in others, we can stop trying to change it. The bargaining bargains itself away.

Resistance and fixing always dissolve…they murder themselves with tiredness. If they don’t tire us into murder, first. Suicide? Homicide? Pain has no preference.

I have so many kite tales. Jeff has them, too. Eric tells them best.

I have so many kite tales. They look like the tails of lions. Boys and girls grip them tight, because my tails are strong. Rooted in the root Chakra. Rooted in Reality.

My tails don’t tell tales. This is what happens when boys become men and girls grow into women. Tales lose their appeal, and tails look more delicious. Sometimes we have to taste Reality before we know we want It.

My tails don’t tell tales. Hold on tight. Watch yourself get brave. Adulting is hard.

Hey Shawn, I get you, Bro. I got you, Bro. Grab me by the tail. I’ll always leave you alone. Even when we’re besties. Love is agendaless. You get to be the one to pick her.