Ghosts in the Morgue
“Most people have never seen a ghost, and never want or expect to, but almost everyone will admit that sometimes they have a sneaking feeling that they just possibly could meet a ghost if they weren’t careful — if they were to turn a corner too suddenly, perhaps, or open their eyes too soon when they wake up at night or go into a dark room without hesitating first.” — Shirley Jackson
I’ll admit that I hoped during my time working in the morgue that I might encounter something that could be construed as a ghost encounter. Despite being a person of science, the sneaking fantasy of having a spectral experience never eluded me. There were times when I was alone in the morgue, no one but me and the fifty or so bodies in the crypts. There were times I was the first one at work before the lights were turned on. I would walk into the morgue, quietly without hesitation, with the hope that I might see a shadow or shape that could be interpreted as a ghost.
It’s a question I receive often, have you ever seen a ghost in the morgue? It’s a reasonable question in many ways. If anyone would possibly have a ghost encounter, you’d think it would be someone who works with dead people. I can see the hope on the person’s face and simultaneously see their face fall as I tell them, “no.” To my chagrin, I have never seen a ghost, nor have I had any experiences that could realistically be interpreted as a ghost encounter. I’m as bummed about it as they are. In the words of stand up comedian John Mulaney, “yes” is the best answer to the question “have you ever seen a ghost?” Unfortunately, I could never give the people what they want.
I oscillate between wanting a genuine ghost encounter and never wanting the experience. When I think about seeing a ghost, I imagine seeing an ethereal light, possibly hovering over the body of the recently deceased. Perhaps upon seeing the light, it would dissolve back to its spectral plane. There’s another type of ghost encounter I was more afraid of. What if a ghost was lingering around its corpse and was pissed off that I just drilled a hole in their skull, flushed out all of their blood and replaced it with embalming fluid? What if a vengeful spirit attached itself to me and followed me home? Again, being surrounded by so much death, a small part of me believes something might be attaching to me. Maybe a spirit from one of the bodies I have worked on over the years has stuck to me in some non-perceptible plane of existence.
Not only did I work in a morgue but I am also someone who also frequents cemeteries. I enjoy bringing a book, sitting by a lone tree and reading amongst the dead. Say what you will but I am someone who found and, from time to time, still finds comfort being among the dead. Again, despite my proclivity for science, the lack of scientific evidence of ghosts existing has not swayed me from having the fantasy of ghosts existing in some capacity. I visited Mount Auburn Cemetery in Cambridge, Massachusetts and took several photos on film. When I got the pictures developed, one of the pictures showed these interesting orbs of light (pictured below) surrounding the crypts. Of course you could explain it way as the flash interacting with moisture in the air, etcetera etcetera. Though, it is certainly more fun to believe I captured something spectral.
When I leave cemeteries, a superstitious part of me feels the need to say to myself, even in my head, “thank you for having me, please don’t come home with me.” I’ve spent countless hours in cemeteries and at least 1000 hours working in a morgue — I always hoped that I might one day have a story to tell the spiritually inclined. A part of me thinks I haven’t seen a ghost because I’m looking in too obvious of places. Morgues and cemeteries? Come on. If ghosts do exist they probably aren’t going to be sticking around the bodies they were stuck to their whole lives.
Most of all, I love the idea of ghosts. I love ghost stories. I love that there are people who have seen ghosts, or believe with their whole hearts that they’ve seen one. And maybe they did. Maybe ghosts are the things we see that we can’t explain. Maybe ghosts give us a narrative to explain unexplainable situations and experiences. Maybe I have seen a ghost and I just didn’t know it at the time. Maybe I have been too careful entering these rooms, opened my eyes too gradually, or have been in the places too obvious to see a glimpse of something spectral. For now I’m content with keeping ghosts in the books and stories I love. Since leaving the morgue, I have felt content having some space from so much death. Regardless, a part of me will always be keeping an eye out for a ghost encounter — maybe one day I’ll be lucky enough to have a story to share.
