Joining the 4 a.m. Club as a Working Single Parent
Big wins and lessons learned by waking up early for just one week!
It’s no new concept that waking up early is a strategy for highly effective people. Luckily for me, I’m an early riser anyway, but I took it upon myself to go all in and wake up at 4 a.m. for a whole week to see what benefits it could bestow upon my life.
⏰ Why I love waking up early
Seeing the first beams of sunlight through the window and hearing the first bird sing. These are the magical moments for which I wake up early.
The realist reasons I have is that between 5.30 a.m. and 7 a.m. I can hear myself think. I can just sit and stare at a wall — if I so choose — and not be disturbed.
Unfortunately, I am not lucky enough to get to stare at a wall most mornings; instead, I get started on some client work for the day or my own writing. However — this does set me up for the day, as although I still have plenty to do for the remaining hours of wakeful consciousness, I can rest safe in the knowledge that something was actually accomplished before the chaos of the day did raineth.
😀 Day 1 of the 4 a.m. club
It’s not too much more of a stretch from 5.30 to getting up at 4 a.m., so the adjustment is not as hard as I thought. The peaceful quiet for which I love early mornings, although still prevalent, feels less like the unbroken peace of a new day and more like the eery lingering of the night before — clawing its way through to conclusion.
Still — I’m up and layered in fleece and in search of coffee and the thermostat, eager to cram in some extra work. Productivity — here I come!
I’m amazed at all the extra work I accomplished and go to bed quite pleased with myself by the end of the day. Of course, it’s a shame that I don’t get to go to bed until gone 11 p.m., as my daughter has trouble sleeping, but this is a small price to pay for organisation.
🙂 Day 2 of the 4 a.m. club
Eyes bleary and needing a second alarm to stir, I still manage to be downstairs making coffee by 4.15 a.m. After realising that I’d been staring at the coffee machine for 5 minutes without moving, I jump into action and take my coffee to the office.
Trying to fit in a few minutes of mindset work before putting the computer on, I sit comfortably in my chair and close my eyes. One of my favourite breathing techniques is box breathing, as it’s simple and calms your mind relatively quickly.
It’s now 7.15 a.m., and my eldest daughter is shaking me. I jump into action and begin the school run drill, reheat my coffee like a champ, and decide to omit the carrot sticks from my daughter’s lunchbox to save time.
When the evening comes round, I’m feeling a little deflated by the additional work I had to do into the evening and plan for a better day tomorrow.
Three alarms set; I head to bed at 1 a.m.
😐 Day 3 of the 4 a.m. club
By the third alarm, I feel myself moving from the bed. It’s possible this was now some kind of out of body experience as I feel like I’m watching myself move whilst willing the motions of my body to continue. I head downstairs and select an intravenous expresso from the kitchen.
Eyes wide and only mildly bloodshot, I get to work on the computer, opting to leave the mindset work for today in order to avoid another late night.
By 7 a.m., I’ve done the work I set out to and only chipped one tooth due to grinding my jaw — a bad habit I’ve picked up on occasion from too much caffeine. But I have more important things to concern myself with today. Third time lucky, day three is set to be a win.
Given that I made such impressive headway in the morning, I get to come to bed at the usual 11 p.m. After crawling up the stairs to bed, I’m pretty sure I just passed out, so pray there’s no emergency in the night, as no act of God could ever rouse me from that sleep.
😥 Day 4 of the 4 a.m. club
Awake by the second alarm, moderately strengthened coffee in hand and no meditating, I sit down at the computer. I have tons of emails. Apparently, my work from the previous day had some errors or just completely missed the whole argument I was meant to be making.
Day 4 will now be spent rectifying the work completed on day 3. I cry.
Bed by 2 a.m., and with only half an eyebrow left (I suffer from trichotillomania, and unfortunately, my eyebrows bear the unhealthy attack of my stress habit), I curl up in a ball under my duvet whilst repeating the mantra “I am a success”.
😞 Day 5 of the 4 a.m. club
Okay, mini-meltdown over. Day 5 is going to be the day I master this beast- surely. I have coffee, a giant blanket (as I can no longer afford the heating), a laptop, and I have zero regards for my mental capacity to handle the day. I am working.
Later in the day, I get a phone call to collect my eldest from school as she’s not well. I bring her home, and after getting food, it’s time to collect my youngest from school.
Heavy eyed, I drive for several miles with my children in tow. But it’s fine. I have a Toyota… it’s got nine airbags!
I work into the evening to finish off all my deadlines for the day and manage a moderately healthy 11:45 p.m. bedtime. Nailed it.
😰 Day 6 of the 4 a.m. club
I’ve got the mornings down now, with my coffee strength optimised and the number of alarms set. However, I seemed to have developed some kind of nervous twitch and subsequently tipped half of my coffee down myself this morning.
When my work was done, I got everything ready for school but managed to knee jerk the kitchen cabinets four times whilst making packed lunches. I then hobble around the house before we set off in the car.
Arms twitching and with a bruised knee, I manage to get the hour’s drive done with no casualties (that I know of), but the petrol light comes on halfway home, and I detour to fill up before the school pickup.
Back home, I look forward to an efficient day, only to find more editing due to decreased work quality, and I feel myself melt off the chair, creating a me shaped puddle on the floor.
Another late night, and a backlog of work to complete the next day, I go to bed feeling like a failure whilst incessantly calling myself a success. Sleep steals my troubles away.
😖 Day 7 of the 4 a.m. club
The twitches are more frequent now, and I only fill my mug halfway (don’t say I never learn from my mistakes). I feel overwhelmed by the weight of tasks to complete and stare blankly at the insignificantly flashing blue light of the computer screen. I glance out the window at the beauty of the moonlight-soaked countryside and sob.
My children wake to find me huddled in the corner and wonder whether it’s a good time to ask me to make breakfast.
Final thoughts
Waking up early gives you more time before the rest of the world is awake to focus on you. You can do more work and get a head start on your day. Of course, it’s worth factoring in the quality of work you may be able to produce, and then offset this from the remaining limited 24 hours that we are blessed with, and try and come to a healthy conclusion as to whether this makes any damn sense.
Disclaimer: This article is written in jest at the feeble attempts to fit any life into the ones of peak productivity touted by gurus. Ultimately, you can only do what you can do. Don’t break yourself, as then you won’t be doing anything. Most importantly, if you’re struggling, please ask for help.
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