After all these days

I am in my sixth semester of college. A time of life where I thought I must be ready with answers to the questions about my future.

I spent a whole lot of my time in college getting ready for this moment. To be ready to answer anyone. The time is almost here. I choose not to have a perfect answer.

I was obsessed with thinking about a future far away. I read a lot and I was possessed with certain biographies I read. I tried to emulate habits in my life. I tried to learn and develop certain set of skills. I kept myself busy. I planned about the life after college when I have just entered it. No matter how random thoughts can get. 
 
Ambition propelled me to do things. Ambitions to do “big”. Something. Anything. Everything. 
 
 Looking at this semester, I have become a person who looks at a calendar and wishes to survive a deadline. Waiting to get done with a responsibility or two. With hopes to get a life after this deadline.

I get nothing but a new deadline.

I don’t know if this is going to be the way of life.(career). But definitely not the way I am going to continue. At this point, I wish to stop thinking too hard. And make way for some peace. 
 
Forethought is a tool. Don’t keep hitting yourself with it. Sometimes wait till you get something to hit.

Right now I wish to travel, read, explore more into music and science. 
 
 About future. No, I am not going to build rockets straightaway. I choose to remain curious and light. I might become something I never anticipate. I’m open for possibilities. I’m open for choices. I will welcome new ideas. I’m never going to close my mind from learning. 
 
 Being open to choices brings more surprises to life. No matter how sweet it sounds, I must be skilled enough to have choices. World is competitive, so yeah. 
 
 That is what I would suggest to anyone starting college. Strengthen skills gradually. Learn fundamentals. And chill. 
 
 No preconditioning. No overthinking about future that is distant. It is good to have a rough plan ahead, not the entire frigging life.

College is full of memories. So many new chapters in life. I am happy about the time I spend here. 
 
 Peace.