Cause of anxiety and mastering it
Let’s think for a moment what causes the anxiety within us? The cause is when we fear losing something or fear an outcome. This emotion is not really a bad thing, because this could help us to run away from danger to save our life or fight back to protect something we love, and researchers have shown through experiments that humans perform better when they are under bit of pressure than the people not under pressure, so there’s a sweet spot somewhere between extreme anxiety and no anxiety. If we could hit that spot more often, we could have an optimal state of mind to perform better in life.
The only problem is, when we get paralysed by anxiety and take no actions, just trying to
distract ourselves from it, rather than getting into it, reflecting what is behind it, we might do
various things to distract ourselves, such as eating, sleeping, watching movies, playing games.
It’s okay to do these stuffs once in a while, but if we try to do these continuously as an escape
plan, it will only make the situation worse in the long-term.
Did you notice I used the word mastering, rather than overcoming, because when you say overcome, it sounds bit overwhelming. You have to work your ass off, but I already told you suppressing or getting rid of them is not the way.You have to let it come and notice when it arises.Where do you get the sensation in your body? Is it around the heart? Stomach? Throat or head? Also, pay attention to the inner voice. What does it say? Is it telling you about all the things that went wrong in the past? Does it discourage you? Does it tease you? Then see what kind of pictures your mind is imagining. Is it playing all the video clips of your past failures? Pay attention, don’t argue with it, don’t change it, just pay attention.
Now initially, it’s obvious that you might forget to pay attention to those, as you face them daily, so let’s take a moment and do an exercise to make it easy to remember. If you want to get results, you will have to take actions, not just read, so do the process as mentioned below.
1. Think of the most recent situation that you got anxious.
2. Get anxious right now and pay attention to that incident. Feel how it feels on your body and where. Hear what the inner voice says, see the pictures and videos playing inside your head; just pay attention; don’t control anything.
3. Now, is it possible for that incident to happen again? If so, go to that situation and notice
how you experience such a situation in future. This time, pay attention to the body, voice, and pictures in your head when it arises, and observe how they work within you, rather than
focusing on external factors, which cause it.
You might ask, is that all? If I just pay attention, will I be able to get rid of it? Is it that simple? Now it might look like a simple thing to read, but the real effectiveness of this practice can only be experienced by applying it in real life situations, as they are happening, so why not experience it for yourself and see. You will be amazed by the results.
If you forget to apply this technique in future anxious moments as they are happening, don’t worry. It’s normal in the beginning, but whenever you realize that you forgot to do it, just acknowledge it and move on, because life has plenty of those tests for you, so don’t worry that you will miss out. Now, did you notice your next best opportunity to meditate and be aware is when you come across your next anxious moment? Are you ready?
The cause of anger and mastering it
This is the next annoying emotion we experience daily, but what is the main reason?
“We are angry when someone or something doesn’t go the exact way we expected”
Think of every moment you got angry and see whether the quote resonates with you. How can the universe not make someone or something happen the exact way we imagined it to be? Go check the agreement the universe signed with you. Could you see the universe mentioning I make sure each and everything you imagine to be manifested for you at the exact moment you want?
Are you asking where the heck is that agreement? You are right; there is no such agreement, so it’s cool! In fact, just think about it how would you feel if everything you wanted happened the exact way you wanted at the exact time you wanted them to happen? Pretty soon, we would die of boredom.
The worst outcome of anger is not anger, but taking actions we regret later when the anger fades away. Have you ever acted out of anger and later regretted it? Take a decision never to act out of anger again.
Whenever you are angry, try to practice this process. Don’t just read; try to apply it to real life situations in real time and see the results for yourself.
1. What sensations do you feel on your body and where? Feel it when it arises.
2. Notice the auditory, visual reactions taking place inside your body, how they try to keep up anger. See how long anger works within you.
3. After some time, eventually, anger will go away; just notice it has disappeared.
4. Ask yourself why you expected someone or something to happen in that exact way.
This doesn’t mean we should not dream or plan about our future. It just means that, as much as we plan to achieve something, we must be prepared to embrace the uncertain adversities life throws at us. Life is playing games with us, testing us. Are you ready to accept those challenges? Here’s another great opportunity for you to meditate. You can wait until you get angry next time to test this technique. At first, you might forget. It’s cool; just acknowledge it and wait for the next moment. Are you ready?