Now, after eating food with zero salt, zero taste, zero anything — to being allowed to eat anything was music to my ears! My urine was flowing like the ganges, my numbers looking great, and I was ready to eat some good food. For the first time, my mother’s food tasted like pure bliss! Everything tasted fantastic — idli’s, sambar, spinach, bottleguard, bitterguard; there was nothing I didn’t like. I ate and relished it all. Just being able to be at home, with my family, listening to conversations, listening to my brother’s side of the transplant and things he had to face, just humbled me to my core. (I will write about his experience as a donor soon!)
At one side, I was happy eating and experiencing life all over again, the other side, my body was going through a huge transformation.
I mean, HUGE.
The medicine dosage were obviously very high at the beginning of the recovery phase — the steroids, the immuno suppressants were at their highest dosage and this caused my body to quickly gain weight, even though I was working out by the first month — walking and then cycling, nothing seemed to slow down the weight gain.
Stretch marks begun to show on my stomach, tiny pimples begun to show on my face, my breasts grew bigger, and most of all — I lost my bum!!
Moving on from my toosh, one part I wish someone tied my hands and kept me away from was SUGAR! Even after all the warnings I couldn’t keep my hands off it, and now I am type-2 diabetic. Stupid me. I know. It’s been four years now, and I hate it. Sometimes managing my diabetes is more stressful than anything else. It’s a tough job — I cannot skip working out, cannot skip checking my range, and always skip sugar. I’ve gone sugar free in my coffee and tea, no cakes. But occasionally, I do indulge in my absolute favorite dessert — CARROT HALWA! It’s something I can’t resist!
I’m used to people eating pastries and other confectioneries in front of me and it does not affect me at all, BUT, I have zero chill when it comes to Carrot Halwa.
That’s when I need to do extra time on my work out.
Nowadays, I stick to just walking. I’m consistent with it, every morning, between 7:30 and 8:30 am, I am at the park listening to Ariana Grande or Kanye or some good old AR Rahman, while brisk walking. I’m not a gym person, and I say this after a lot of gym experience. I like the outdoors better. — I love playing badminton and love swimming if I have company! But for now, it’s a lot of brisk walking.
To maintain my diabetes, I have started eating Ragi porridge for breakfast everyday with one Egg white. Mum mixes half rice and half millet for my lunch and I stick to 2 chapatis for dinner. I do get hungry in the evening and I go a little crazy on the chips and other munchies — listen, I don’t want to be a ‘size zero’, thank you very much. I’m happy and have always been happy in my skin, and with my body. I love my curves!!
Currently, I’m back on insulin unfortunately. I’ve been beyond stressed with a lot of things happening in my personal life and I just couldn’t seem to get a grip on my sugar levels even though I wasn’t having any. After consulting with my doctor, he said that stress is a major contributing factor in diabetes, and that I should consciously try to bring down my stress levels.
And what did I do?
I had lassi, ice creme and carrot halwa, I ate grapes, oranges and any other fruit (I love fruits), I went dancing, went drinking, you get the drift. Basically did anything to bring me joy. I ate all that and didn’t worry about my sugar. I’m not saying that’s what everyone should do, but that’s what I did. My sugar levels are back to normal, and my stress levels, well, I wouldn’t say are normal, but it’s something I have to keep working on.
Life after kidney transplant is challenging. There are new obstacles to face every now and then, one learns to deal with a new normal which is filled with
medication, new routines, check-up’s, health scares, stretch marks, acne, and diabetes.
It’s stressful, no doubt, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. It has humbled me, grounded me and made me stronger than I ever imagined. I’m seeing my body in new and different ways, seeing life and food in a new light. Everything is in bright techicolour and I love it. I hope you will try and see the brighter side of things, I know that’s easier said than done, but take it from someone who has seen the dark.
I thought I’ll keep this post fun and light — I have been super serious in all the others. I know, we recipients tend to over think and analyse much more than the common man — it doesn’t hurt to go easy on ourselves every once in a while, no?
Originally published at https://www.rasamsambar.com on March 31, 2019.