My Timing is Off

AJ Johnson
Jul 22, 2017 · 2 min read

I’m a pirate. Argh!

No, really. I’m wearing an eyepatch right now. Something about my right eye being the coworker who does nothing and gets all the credit while my left eye pulls all the weight. Your typical group project.

Of course, this is terrible timing. There’s never really a good time for your body to fail you.

And fail you it will. They all do. Memento Mori.

Having a cross-eyed moment isn’t life threatening. But as the idiot kid setting off firecrackers at the gas station shouted, “You can die getting out of bed in the morning, old man!”

I’m working towards one of those Bucket List experiences we all yearn for, and I’ve been making all of my decisions based on it for the past year. A year. Then a month out, my eye attempts to fail me.

Keep going. Relentless forward progress.

Things got a lot more difficult. Things do.

I got a lot stronger. As I do. As you do. When faced with adversity, human beings either crumble or create solutions. You are not an either/or. You can take five minutes to crumble, then create.

I did. I cursed the gods. I threw a legitimate fit.

Then I bought a collection of $3 eyepatches at the drugstore, broke out bedazzling skills I learned from my past life in burlesque, and created my own solution.

Anything can fail you. Keep in mind the motto of long distance runners: Relentless Forward Progress.

Then add rhinestones. They improve everything.

AJ Johnson

Written by

Writing about my Stranger Than Fiction life. Climbing mountains. Surfing waves. These are not metaphors. A raving looney, but good at it.

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