
The Underestimated Power of Networking: A beginners Guide — Part Two
Welcome to part two of this three-part series. If you missed part one you can check it out at HERE.
From part one, you’ve set clear networking objectives, a strategy to execute and completed the mental preparation to follow-through. Now, it’s time to network.
In part two, we will look at the objectives, steps and tips to make the most out of a networking opportunity.
B. Networking Opportunity
Objectives:
• Meet new people;
• Build comfort with your potential new connection;
• Understand a little about them and have a (brief) meaningful exchange; and
• Obtain their contact details.
Steps & Tips
1. Find New People — When you arrive at a networking event, avoid gravitating to people you know. You should initially thank the host (if you can) and then immediately find someone new to introduce yourself to. And I do mean immediately! This will help keep you in the right frame of mind as to why you came and stop you from getting stage fright and sinking into a dark corner.
2. Introductions
a. Smile & Shake Hands — When you first meet someone introduce yourself shake their hand and smile. You be surprised how many people to forget to do this simple task.
b. Eye Contact — When a person is talking to you, be sure to look directly at them. Giving a person full attention with your eyes will encourage them to share more. When giving someone eye contact, remember it’s not a “stare-down” contest. Give the person 3 to 5 seconds of eye contact and then look away briefly before returning your focus to them again. I note here eye contact can vary across people in culture. In a country like Australia it will pay significantly to develop your emotional and cultural intelligence to know when to adjust this.
c. Remember Names — Introductions tend to pass in a blur, with both parties quickly blurting out names and then taking sips from their drink. As a result, no one remembers who anyone is. The solution: slow down and stay present. I always repeat a name once or twice after I’ve heard it and when speaking to the person I address them by name as this helps glue it to my memory. The added bonus is your psychologically helping to build rapport — studies have shown people like hearing their own name and you will build rapport faster by using theirs. Now, if you forget a name, you can discreetly look at their business card, ask a third party for help, or listen for it in conversation. If all else fails, come clean and just ask for their name again. It’s a normal thing that happens to all of us and most people will understand. I note if everyone is wearing name tags its easier but don’t get caught constantly staring at a persons name tag because you forget their name every 2 minutes — the person is likely to sense your insincerity.
d. Introducing Other People — The true hallmark of a skilled and gracious networker is the ability to introduce people with ease. In addition to announcing names, offer a piece of information about each person, or a shared interest, thereby facilitating a conversation. Introducing people also tends to increase your status with the new contact, demonstrating you are a person of means. If you asked them “what brings them to the event?” you may be able to help with a strategic introduction.

e. People Standing By Themselves — If you are nervous about approaching a group, why not start with a group of one! People standing by themselves are more likely to give you a warm welcome as you’ve provided them with the comfort of no longer being alone.
f. Always Keep A Hand Free — Always keep one hand free to allow yourself to shake hands with people. This means that you shouldn’t eat and drink at the same time. Remember, you’re there to network, not fill up on snacks.
3. Conversation
a. Good Quality Conversations — “The fundamental element that defines the quality of your life is the people you surround yourself with and the conversations you have with them”. The second part of this quote is often over looked, you can’t be just surrounded with good people but you have to make an effort to create good quality conversations. This is where your pre-networking preparation kicks in — it’s time to make with the questions you prepared earlier.
b. Ask & Listen — Sometimes the best conversation is not conversation at all. Remember that people love to talk about themselves, especially when they have an attentive listener. After the person has shared something with you, ask them a follow up question about what they just said. This shows that you’re paying attention and that you care about what they’re telling you.
c. Equal Exchange — With consideration to the point above although everyone likes someone to be interested in them, if you want to build relationships through networking then let them get to know you as much as you’re getting to know them. Tell them a little about yourself, be brave about sharing and don’t just tell them the same kinds of details everyone else is sharing — stand out! If you are worried about the risk of doing this go back and read the Manage Expectation points in the Pre-Network Section.
d. Don’t Ask For Anything / Give Before Receiving — When you first meet someone ask nothing from them. Asking for something too early is the quickest way to turn somebody off and kill your chances of developing a relationship. As you get to know them either at the networking event or later offer assistance to them. When you give help, people are more willing to help you in return. However, don’t give with the expectation of receiving. Not all relationships will be equal and thinking that way cultivates an expectation that if not fulfilled can have a negative impact on the relationships you have and how you feel. In fact, from my own observation this makes your world smaller and you actually receive less. Think of yourself as a farmer — first you need to plant your seeds and nurture your crop before getting a return — patience pays!
4. Additional Rapport Building
a. Seek Common Ground — There is a shortcut to fostering a new relationship with real roots: figure out what you and the other person have in common. Whether you went to the same school or both love to snowboard, focusing on the similarities between you is a quick way to develop a rapport. So don’t be afraid to ask personal questions that let the individual speak about him or herself: Where are you from? Do you have kids? What was the last holiday you went on? Etc.
b. Suss Out Your Contact’s Passions — For the more experienced networkers before meeting someone you’d like to develop a relationship with, do an online search to uncover what they’re truly interested in, from charities they support to any awards they have received. If you are at an event and you like the person you are talking to, you may be extremely cheeky and excuse yourself to the bathroom to quickly jump on your phone and search the web for some details that could help in the conversation! Although this might sound underhanded, doing your homework shows a sincere interest in the other person as an individual, and not just as a business contact. Again, this should only be done by more experienced networkers as any details you learn on the go need to be subtly weaved into the conversation.
5. Business Cards
a. Personalise Your Business Card — When giving a person your card, personalize it by hand writing your mobile number on it or some other important details like a website for a restaurant you recommended during the conversation (“let me write it down for you”). This will cause the recipient to feel that they are receiving something special.

b. Selectively Handover Your Business Card — Treat your business card like a credit card, and give by connection and not just because you’ve shaked someone’s hand. If the recipient sees you are selectively giving out your card it makes them feel special. In addition, it helps you to focus on the main game — creating connnections.
6. LinkedIn — LinkedIn is a great way to connect with people post networking events and also learn more about them. However it only adds value if you have already started to develop a connection with them. If you intend to ask them to connect on LinkedIn make sure towards the tail end of your conversation that you ask them if they are on LinkedIn, tell them you would like to connect with them and ask if that is ok. Some people don’t have LinkedIn (although I suggest if they are career building they should) or prefer other methods to connect and communicate.
7. Make A Clean Getaway — Make sure you close out your conversations properly. Your exit is important, if you leave and it looks like your running off because you’re bored or you leave your connection feeling weird then you are undoing your hard work. It doesn’t have to be complicated, you can say something simple like “I’ve enjoyed talking to you and I hope to talk to you again”. Or make it more personable and mention something from the conversation that meant something to you “thank you for educating me on horse riding I really enjoyed that, I’m going to connect with you on LinkedIn and will call you soon for a catch up”.
8. Write Down Notes — After you meet someone for the first time, use the back of their business card to jot a note about something you learned from the conversation and the date and place you met them. Recording the information will give you something to talk to them about the next time you see them. If you need to write down further notes you can either wait until you get home or if you are worried you will forget quickly, run off somewhere quiet (perhaps a quick trip back to bathroom) to write your notes. In the long run, with practice, you will be able to train your brain and remember more details without the need to write them down straight away. In any case, if you are making meaningful connections you will be genuinely interested in the individual which makes it much easier to remember things about them.
9. Visit As Many Groups As Possible That Spark Your Interest — Not all networking groups are created equal nor do they all suit your networking objectives. As part of your longer term networking strategy, take your time to explore many networking groups and observe the tone and attitudes. Ask yourself do the people sound supportive of one another? Does the leadership appear competent? As you become more experienced narrow down which groups suit you best.
Stayed tuned for part three of this series next week, where we will look at how to get value from your networking through ‘Post-Networking Tasks & Follow-Ups’.
What is your networking tip? or what has brought you the most success when networking?
Share your thoughts in the comments below.
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Original post at: andrewwalsh.co/theblog/networking-beginners-guide-p2/