Watch This Space

I’m starting a thing. It’s called Real Masculinity with Dara Kharabi. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and watching yet another facebook argument trace out the same familiar lines just pushed me over the edge. I’m going to have this be a kind of “mission statement.”

I’m going to write about masculinity here, about my personal experience being a man in America, and about how I feel like a lot of people get masculinity wrong. I’ll also take a lot of tangents, because there are other things I want to write about, too. I’m hoping that writing about this stuff will help other people. I want to help men and boys navigate society better, I want to bridge gaps between hostile and competing definitions of masculinity, and I want to help masculinity find a comfortable spot in our dynamic and changing society. Most of all, I want to help facilitate ways for people to think and talk about masculinity without getting so goddamn frustrated.

Now, here are some things I’m not looking to do:

  • I’m not looking to argue. I’ve had my fill of stupid back-and-forths about gender roles, and it always seems to turn into a kind of rhetorical cutting contest. Total waste of time. On the other hand, I am hoping to learn by doing this. I think writing about my views will bring other views out of the woodwork, and I’m excited to broaden my horizons and strengthen my mental framework by learning from and incorporating those views.
  • I’m not looking to inspire dogma. People like certainty, authority, and not having to think too hard. Knowing that, I’m calling my blog “Real Masculinity,” as a kind of appeal to authenticity — a more accurate name for my ideas would be “new masculinity.” The flip side to this is that some people might interpret my ideas as the only correct manner by which to navigate society. I don’t stand for that.

Cool, now let’s get started.

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