Cheesy Pick Up Lines

This ginormous cheese pizza is as big as the two person table I sat at while visiting downtown Louisville, KY. It is from the restaurant Sicilian’s Pizza & Pasta.

I keep an array of pickup lines in the notes section on my phone. This list makes me chuckle from time to time. They are in no particular order and some of them are a bit more forward than others, but I hope this list makes you smile like it does for me!

• Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.
• I know you’re out of grocery items but you are totally checking me out.
• Are you wearing space-pants? ‘Cause your a$$ is out of this world!
• Are you an earthquake ‘cause you just rocked my world.
• My name is Rebekah but you can call me tonight.
• I know it’s not Christmas, but my lap is always ready.
• You gotta be jelly ‘cause jam don’t shake like that!
• Do you have a Band Aid cause I just scraped my knee falling for you.
• If I were a stop light I would turn red every time you stopped by just so I could stare at you a while longer.
• You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?
• Smoking is hazardous to your health and baby you’re killing me.
• Your daddy must have been a baker ‘cause you’ve got the nicest pair of buns I’ve ever seen.
• Life without you would be like a broken pencil ...pointless.
• You’re like milk, I just want to make you a part of my complete breakfast.
• My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in!
• I’m not actually this tall I’m just sitting on my wallet.
• Your a$$ is so nice… it’s a shame you have to sit on it!
• Did you wash your pants in Windex? ‘Cause I can just see myself in them.
• Did you get your pants on sale? ‘Cause at my house they would be 100% off.
• I just want to live in your socks, so I can be with you every step of the way.
• You’re like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life.
• Is there an airport nearby, or is that my heart taking off?
• Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I need to walk by again?
• If I said you had a nice body would you hold it against me?
• You’re so sweet you’re giving me a toothache!
• If a fat man puts you in a bag tonight, don’t worry, I asked for you for Christmas.
• You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall is in love with me!
• If I were an enzyme I’d be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes!
• Whenever I am near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away!
• Oh hey you’ve got something on your a$$ …oh wait, it’s just my eyes!
• Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam!
• I hope there aren’t any police around ‘cause I’m about to steal your heart.
• Are you a keyboard? ‘Cause you’re just my type!
• We’re not socks. But I think we’d make a great pair.

Not a pick up line:

• Let’s make like a sheep herder and get the flock outta here.
• Make like Santa and leave my presence!