“I’m clean.” It’s the quintessential pitch, furtively uttered by the eager in an effort to smooth their way into unprotected sex. As bottoms come off, a hand reaches toward the nightstand drawer. The words come softly, trying not to spoil the flow, “I’m clean, we don’t need a condom … I just know, cuz I’m careful …” That’s typically the extent of their airtight case for being STD-free. The claim hangs in the shadows, a junk product waiting for a buyer. The speaker believes it, they feel it, and since it aligns with what they want right now, it becomes a fact.
Many who think they’ve outgrown that behavior (either doing or tolerating it) are now perpetrating it on a larger scale. Instead of having to entreat whoever they’re pressed up against in bed to take on risk for their benefit, they now inflict reckless behavior upon random fellow citizens without saying a word. If asked why they refuse to take basic safety measures in the middle of a pandemic, their justification is the same: “I’m healthy, I’m clean. Why should I have to wear a mask around other people? Why should I have to keep my distance?” Just like the condom-avoider above, they’re full of shit and willing to risk other people’s safety and lives to get what they want.
The following is an appropriate (and generous) response to those who claim to be healthy and therefore justified in not taking simple precautions to protect themselves and others from a potentially deadly virus: “You’re healthy? You’re clean? How do you know? Because you feel fine, you’re not coughing, you don’t have a fever or shortness of breath? Even you know that’s meaningless. So, you must have proof that you’re virus-free because you got tested, quarantined yourself until you received your negative results, and maintained quarantine up until you made that statement? You didn’t do all that. So just admit that you want what you want and don’t care about other people.”
Let’s stop accepting nonsense on its face or as a jumping-off point for a discussion. If someone admits their dishonesty or selfishness, that can be a starting point for communication. If not, then pull up your pants, hop out of bed, and leave them alone in their dim space.
