There was a time when I certainly believed all my thoughts. There was this constant running narrative making observations about life around me, issuing instruction on how I should or shouldn’t behave, giving its opinion on what others may or may not think of me, how I was measuring up, ad infinitum.
I’m guessing this makes sense to you because you’ve no doubt experienced or are still experiencing this going on inside your own mind right now.
And it’s exhausting isn’t it.
This is what it’s like being ‘in’ our thoughts. We’re caught up in the detail of each thought…
Anxiety seems to touch everyone’s lives. Millions of days are lost at work because of anxiety, children are being medicated because of anxiety, people are living small lives because of anxiety. But what is it?
What is anxiety really?
The Oxford English Dictionary defines it as:
A feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease about something with an uncertain outcome.
It also defines it as:
A nervous disorder marked by excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behaviour or panic attacks.
Worry, uneasiness, apprehension, nervousness are all feelings. They are feelings we experience on and off during all day long. Part…
What are the things you’d really like to say when you respond with a simple “I’m fine”?
I can remember back to times when someone would ask me how I was and I’d say “I’m fine” as if on autopilot when deep inside I was scared to death.
I daren’t say what was really going on for fear of unravelling completely. Believing that if I started crying or showing my struggle that I’d end up…well who knows where.
I had to be strong, holding it all together for myself and for my family. I had to be the warrior mum…
We think there’s something wrong with us, we run from the feeling because it’s painful. We numb it, we turn to our addiction of choice. Anything to ease the pain, the fear, the uncertainty.
Of course a horrible feeling is unpleasant but it’s not life threatening. We don’t need to turn to any of our habits for relief when we see that the feeling itself can’t hurt us. The feeling is in fact neutral. Our suffering comes when we create a story around that feeling.
When we can simply say, “I’m feeling anxious, depressed, frightened, stressed, or scared” and not…
I love this tweet I came across recently
“Shit I need to get rid of:
imposter syndrome, procrastination, delaying meals/snacks, comparing myself to others, all or nothing thinking.
None of that is welcome this week. Or any week.”
How many of us can raise our hands to wanting this too?
I’ve been the same in the past. Imposter syndrome still raises its head occasionally , as does comparing myself to others….oh and procrastination, yup, that one too.
The difference these days, is this:
I now know that these are all thoughts, and if you’ve been hanging around us for a…
Every January, like clockwork, we are bombarded with images and messaging on social media, TV, the sides of buses(!) that urge us to commit to transforming our bodies this year — to ‘make this year count’ towards achieving the superficial goals that are forced upon us by the media and advertising agencies.
It’s like they’re hiding, waiting to pounce on anyone who might feel the slightest bit insecure while we’re enjoying (or at least trying to enjoy) the festive period in December. And then BAM! …
I want to take you back in time. Back to a time in my life when the outlook felt bleak. If I’m honest with you it looked bleak on and off for over 10 years. Being in my head was a pretty grim place to hang out and yet that’s what I did, day in, day out for years. On the surface I seemed to have it all, a lovely home, a husband, good food on the table, 3 beautiful, healthy children, I had friends and family who loved me and yet I felt depressed. …
I was out for a walk the other morning listening to one of my favourite podcasts and was grabbed by the title of this episode — The Unreliable Narrator — and instantly saw the truth in it. We are all unreliable narrators in our own lives and we don’t even know it. And because we are unaware of it, it’s having a deep impact on our lives.
We’re hearing and believing ‘stories’ all day long from within the confines of our own minds aren’t we. You (like me) might not even be aware that this is what they are. …
It’s National Grief Awareness Week and we thought it important to go off topic momentarily to share our thoughts on grief and its expression. We’re not great at talking of death and loss as a nation. We tend to brush it under the carpet, say we’re ‘fine’ when asked and bottle it all up.
You’ll read in the following short pieces our own thoughts on grief in our vulnerability. I hope they offer you food for thought.
Grief comes out of nowhere and mugs you. …
Why would an eating disorder be a coping strategy? Why would something so destructive be used as a way to cope? It seems mad doesn’t it. You might not even see it that way right now. I hope this post helps deepen your understanding.
Let’s take a step back. You may well have heard Bea and I share this before and it always bears repeating.
There is a thought feeling connection. We have a thought and almost instantly we have a feeling about that thought — good, bad, neutral. We’ve learned to chase the good feelings and run from the…