Texans To Trump: “We Don’t Have Boots High Enough For Your Bullshit!”
Allan Ishac
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We were in Austin when he landed. If you saw it on TV, you know he said, “What a great crowd turning out to see me.”

That crowd really turned out to see Johnny Manziel, who was on the flight arriving after Air Force One. We all wanted to see if his latest stint in rehab helped or he would stumble off the plane drunk. When we realized it was Trump, not Manziel, all but a dozen hard core Trump fans returned to the lobby even though Trump offered to sign Trump hats.[1]

The rest of Austin was anywhere else.

[1]They weren’t free, he only offered to sign them. He was selling them for $1o0 because these were the special “hurricane” hats with cheap paper “Harvey” stickers stuck on the front. In his rush to get them out they accidentally ordered stickers of Harvey the white rabbit, not Harvey the Hurricane.