Choosing the right environment influence
It’s been a while since I wrote a few words where I expressed that I do not want to be influenced by the wrong environment. I wanted to add some thoughts today. The thing is, that in the end, it’s our responsibility whether we let ourselves get influenced by others or not. It depends on us if we let the wind take us off the road. However, lately, I’ve been wondering why the heck would I willingly get surrounded by those I do not want to become?
I believe we all have a huge potential. Yes, some people are more monkeys than others, that’s fine. But I do not believe that the factory worker’s potential is just that. Give him some education, and mainly let him imagine he can become someone else, show him his opportunities, and let him fly. He will.
I believe that one of the most valuable things is not telling people what to do, but rather leading them — showing them the opportunities, the possible paths they may take. If you are born in the village, you see only other villagers around with the fate of remaining in the village and taking care of cows. You do not see that you can go to the city or another country — not because it’s not possible, but because others do not show you any such example that it is possible. That’s what I try to communicate through my content on social media (LinkedIn or my IG) aka “Hey guys, you can do this too, but only if you want”.
But besides this, I am observing. People, environment, vibe, stuff. For some reason — not sure whether I am that empathetic or what — I can feel the vibe pretty right and promptly. Like I enter the city or country and I tell you. I know if I stay or not if it’s worth it or not. I tell you the mentality hidden behind the grey coats and stuff. And what’s funny — I am right. I’ve never really changed my mind about someplace.
And by being observant, I am also reflecting on myself a lot. I realize, that despite I am stubborn, and you may say I am hard to be changed by someone else, I know that the environment has an influence on you whether you want it or not. Despite this, of course, it’s you and only you, who make the change. It’s you and your action and thoughts over the place and other people. Always.
Yes. You can remain kind while being surrounded by bad people. You can remain non-smoking while being around smokers. You can avoid sweets despite you buy them at home and feeling like a hero. I could continue here for no point, of course.
But why the heck would you be doing it? It’s like bringing obstacles into your own way aka “haha, I will be stronger”. Well, and how about becoming stronger by just going on? I mean the way is not easy. You do not have to add other sh*ts on it to prove yourself your worth. How about simplifying it? How about working on your imagination and seeing yourself in a new position? What about being around people who are like the one you want to become? And, what if you moved to a place that makes you happy?
The longer I am away from my country, the more I do not see the point of going back. I have many amazing friends there and there are some beautiful people, but the general vibe and local mentality are too toxic for me. I know that I grew into a totally different sphere. I overgrew the local job market. And I do not understand people I used to work with years ago. It doesn’t say anything about them or me. It says only that by going back, I couldn’t grow anymore in the direction I want or I need (in case I consider self-development and self-actualization as a need).
From another perspective: Why would I go back to a central European country with shitty weather most of the year (more than half a year, it’s cold), with unwelcoming racist people (I know it’s not just there), rising housing (not only) prices, crazy taxes & social and health “insurance”, shitty local food, bad quality of most products (or you pay well) and not worthy price vs. value ratio?
I mean — I could. I know the language, I know people and some places there. So, for me to settle down and find some job in the office there would be more or less easy. But why would I do that, if I can choose from the rest of the world? I know that remote work has many throwbacks. And, in the end, there’s no one best country to live in. But the world is truly beautiful. Even if I wanted just one of the things I named that I do not like, to be fixed, I would have many options to choose from.
There’s this funny thing about exploration and understanding of the world: every single time I talk to someone, they believe that everything in the east from their country, is a deserted place without electricity. The second funny thing is that people tend to consider the place where they stay (especially where they were born) as the safest. When you see the data, it’s far from reality — yet here we can discuss how trustworthy it is.
Personally, I had underestimated Thailand badly. I try not to have any expectations when traveling the places and so far, it’s been the best. When I moved to Georgia randomly (haha, I know how it sounds, but I really did know nothing), I knew only that it’s in the Caucasus, that there is Tbilisi and Batumi, seaside, that people speak English and Russian, and I knew to make khachapuri (local bread with cheese). But beside it? I saw a few photos, but that’s it. I realized how crazy it was when I was entering the country and the taxi driver took me to my quarantine hotel through the beautiful city center.
I still haven’t been to many places in the world — considering that I traveled mostly only to Europe, plus Dubai, Georgia, Russia, and Thailand. Now I feel ashamed. There’s still so much to see. When I was at EXPO in Dubai, I visited pavilions of many countries I haven’t even almost known existed. I was pleasantly surprised by how many places on earth are worth visiting. It was foolish of me to think that I’d almost seen it all. I had the impression of ultimateness when I was in southern France in September 2020 and I’ve realized it’s been one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever visited. I was happy to see such beauty and sad at the same time — what’s next?
Since then I’ve said “It’s one of the most beautiful places” a few more times. And I know that there’s even much more to see. So many new perspectives of the world, of people, humanity, and myself, to explore! So many new ones to even find out they exist. Instead, I should be afraid I won’t make it everywhere. I should feel the urge to keep moving. ‘If you lose speed, you lose power.’ said my Thai box trainer to me.
And yet, there are many people who will hardly ever move from their place, but it’s fine too. I believe we all should find the right place on earth for living. The right place where we will be happy the way we are. And considering the latest changes in the past years, we should also build more flexibility and being ready to move to a better place anytime. I believe there will be much more migration in the next years. And, with this, even more freedom, and market relations between jurisdictions.
Bringing all this together, why should I stay in the place I do not enjoy? Why should I remain surrounded by people who are not supportive or at a similar level as I am?
Honestly, one of the most difficult insights lately I had to accept, is that I will have to let some people go before I will be able to move on. When driving a scooter here in Thailand, I’ve realized, I cannot really go faster as long as I hold the brake. (Well, Sam, no sh*t… — if you know me for a while, you may noticed I love these simple life metaphors.)
We may overgrown some people, job markets, and even countries and their mentalities and it’s fine. But it’s our job to be aware about it, identify it, accept it and let go. Or, we get stuck at one place and it’s fine too. As long as we do not blame anyone else for it. Just… Being watchful to see all the options life offers is easier when surrounded by the right people. Cheers. I’ll head to find mines. (If you want to connect, try texting me on LI or IG, but it’s sometimes easier to catch up with me offline than via messages :) I am just trying hard to be more offline).
Fancy supporting me? I will truly appreciate it, especially if I brought you some new perspective or made you think about something you haven’t been thinking about before! I have a BuyMeACoffee page or BTC/ETH. Thank you so much. ❤️
BTC: bc1q0qhy7tadctu9qd9z4an9jem9vvrlcmtyvnqd9w
ETH: 0x871AE4fE59921a625bba996d795aCA7Db3185FBc
