What Drives Men to Rape?
Emma Lindsay

I want to contrast your notion of emotional regulation with your article “Being Single is Hard”. Not because I disagree with anything you said, in either article.
But as you highlighted, emotional regulation is difficult for anyone outside the boundaries of a relationship. This doesn’t negate the point that women shoulder an unfair burden in this process, only that the idea of being able to individually shoulder emotional burdens is pretty fraught.
The difference lies in the sense of entitlement to that help. Men are taught in every medium that I’m aware of that every nerd is entitled to date a super model, if that’s what he thinks he needs. He need only struggle hard enough to “make” her see his value. I can’t talk in any depth about the message women are given regarding what they’re entitled to. I suspect that women aren’t taught to be entitled to anything, because as the object of the narrative of entitlement taught to men, their needs are not part of any calculus.

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