Taking out the Trash: Validation
Part of growing up is supposed to be independence. Choosing and doing for ourself. As adults we’re no longer required to have our parents sign for us or show them our report cards, yet lack of permission can leave us feeling a little lost.
Even though I’ve outgrown permission slips for field trips, I still catch myself asking for permission. Its not something that’s easy to own up to, but it’s true. Permission in the form of validation. That stamp of approval. The gold star. That affirmation that it’s the right choice, decision or idea.
This desire or need for validation alters our perception. It changes our course, our motivations or even worse. When our desires hinge on whether someone else approves we can end up in the the scariest place of all, a place where we don’t even recognize ourselves.
This year I made the commitment of letting go. Validation is just one more thing that needs to go to the curb with the rest of the trash.