TALKATIVE ME

So, if you’ve read the book EAT,PRAY, LOVE,you will know that there was a time when the Author was in an Ashram, and she had to practice silence….

Any way, I am like that. I literally have to tell myself to be quiet, tell my spirit to be quiet, and my brain to be quiet. I am very very nervous when I am quiet. I don’t know why. Maybe I am afraid of communing with my inner being. Afraid of the strengths, the flaws,the blah blah blah.

But, I have grown to learn that most talkative people aren’t good listeners, and therefore, learnt the art of good communication, and I am still learning. Because, I feel the pain of not been heard, when in a group having conversations. Or watching other voices been drowned out because of a contrary opinion.

I have also discovered that for many people, talking is a coping mechanism; they don’t hold on to feelings for very long. They hurt less, but also do less. And life just goes on. Others talk because it makes them feel good about themselves, because sharing information validates them. Others, aaaaa just have to talk because they are the vines of the grapevine, bearing sour grapefruits. These are the gossips. Why they do, I don’t know. Honestly.

But, for me, I talk, and I talk a lot,for the most part. And since silence hasn’t been a very friendly companion to me, I always mentally browse through my daily conversations, to recall what information u may have divulged that could be used to my detriment because you see, I have been wounded by being too trusting,and I have paid for not listening to my dad when he said, “Dorcas, this your mouth will put you in trouble”. And it has.

So now, I am carefully talkative, enjoying gists, and conversations, debates, sometimes even, arguments.

When there is no one to talk to, i talk with my friends, and that’s how they said I should write this piece, since I can’t shut up and slee……p

Oh….good night