Richard Lyon
Sep 3, 2018 · 2 min read

Hey Tracy! Thanks for the entertaining read. Here’s a question: ever dropped a used wet-wipe down the toilet and had it just disappear, as if by magic? Then you, ma’am, have been the recipient of another form of invisible labor — the dirty, frequently dangerous, invisible work disproproportionately done by men —that actually keeps society functioning and which, taken together, amount to the big things in life: the glue that holds households, and by extension, proper society, together.

I mention this because it’s, well, invisible, and therefore may have escaped your notice. I also mention it because the occupational diseases, illnesses, and deaths that arise from thousands of these essential-but-invisible social tasks are a real issue, as distinct from the manufactured ones (such as the scheduling of birthday reminders) that now serve as the grievances that Western feminism must promote to the level of “issue” now that all the real ones have been solved.

However, the real purpose of my response is to offer some guidance. In your final paragraph, you suggest that your gentleman should set up the necessary calendar to manage the administration of these society-critical tasks. Here in the UK, and I suspect in the US, three times more men than women work 45+ hours a week [1] — possibly accounting for one of the reasons they die several years earlier than your gender (although that might also because they receive only 23% of all gender-specific research money) [2]. So he’s likely to be home late. And, of course, men suffer 97% of all workplace fatalities [3], so there’s always the possibility he might not come home at all.

So, if you don’t want to be inconvenienced by all that tedious waiting around for him to return (or not) from his 45+ hour week at the sewage plant/slaughterhouse/building site/power-line installation/oil-rig/burning building/etc., you might want to summon all of your admirable patience for his muddle-headed ignorance of your invisible grievances, and do that 5 minute job yourself. Then all he has to do when he gets home is slip off his sewage-bespattered waders, and he can get right down to hiring that deep cleaning service for you. Simple!

Anyway, good luck, and happy birthday when it comes around (again, and again, and again).

Sources:

[1] UK Office For National Statistics.
[2] UK Medical research Council. 2013. “Projects making explicit reference to men, women, boys or girls (2009–2013)”.
[3] UK Health and Safety Executive. RIDDOR reported injuries by age, gender, and broad industry group 2009–2014.

Richard Lyon

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Liberal egalitarian. Passive House owner. Traveller. Photographer.