Erin I see your situation and I one up you — what if in the same community, you feel “lonely” but…
Anna Tropnikova

I wouldn’t say my advice is “nice in theory” and “only works swimmingly for someone who’s single” (if anything, your situation proves my point “If you feel lonely where you live, you’ll be miserable”, yes you do have your significant other and a nice house and ideal work situation… But you’re still unhappy).

This doesn’t show I’m wrong, it just means you’re doing the wrong thing.

Judging from your comment, the right thing for you would be:

  1. Your significant other finds a job in SF (you work from home so you have a big advantage).
  2. You find a cheap[er] place that’s (maximum) 10 miles from where your significant other works, so he can bike there every day (more details here).
  3. You move to SF.

Now you might say, “but SF is too expensive” and I’ll say “find a way to make more money”.

If those solutions aren’t humanly possible for any reason, study stoicism or something that would make you appreciate your current situation more (meditation, yoga, gratitude, religion… anything). That might make you happy with what you have.

But all you’re doing right now is blaming:

  • Your apartment complex’s residents.
  • Strangers in Teslas.
  • My post.
  • The Bay Area.

I can guarantee that won’t make you happy.

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