The thing is, you keep saying something is your employer’s problem when it clearly is not. Their problem, if anything, is how to keep their employees happy and producing profit. If paying for the expenses you envisions as their responsibility will result in more profit, less turn over, and there is not a loss for them if they do so, its something that can and should be negotiated.
Look at what happened when you pointed out the problem.
They PAID for it. Communicate your needs and if the company values enough they will act.
You complain about the IRS codes without acknowledging that the man, while traveling and working, was the one that paid the tax bills. The wife and kid are anything but “free”. They are paid for by providing food and shelter as well as funds for the other necessities of life. And child care, by the way, is also tax deductible. If you have not been taking advantage of that, you likely need a better tax preparer.
Want a comparable “benefit”? Get a room mate who pays for the rent by babysitting. This used to be done by living with family. The grand parents watch the kids while you go to work.