Trump Wants Chick-fil-a Open on Sundays

If Donald Trump has his way, you’re going to get to eat Chick-fil-a all weekend long.

In a recent statement, the GOP candidate for president hinted at using executive privilege to force Chick-fil-a to open on Sundays. “It will be great,” said Trump. “We’ll have chicken sandwiches. We’ll have them for Sunday lunch and we’ll have the chicken mini biscuits that are perfect for my tiny fingers for breakfast. We’re going to win this in such a huge way.”

Chick-fil-a has traditionally been closed on Sundays in order to allow their employees the opportunity to go to church and spend time with families. Trump wants to change that. “I’ve been to Chick-fil-a. They’re good people. Wonderful people. I have a lot of friends, I mean a lot of friends there. In fact, I used to own a dairy farm with cows. Cows just like the Chick-fil-a cows. They’re wonderful cows.”

Public reaction has been mixed, especially among evangelicals. Mary Perkins, a resident from Macon, Georgia and also a Southern Baptist, said “Making those kids work on Sunday there at Chick-fil-a is just wrong. This would clearly be a violation by any president to do this. Besides, we eat at Shoney’s after church anyway, so we probably wouldn’t go to Chick-fil-a if they were open.”

Longtime Trump supporter Harvey Blackstone from Jasper, Alabama feels differently. “You got to love Mr. Trump. I mean yeah, forcing a business to change their hours is wrong, but he says what he means. He’s not a politician.”

Numerous restaurants including KFC and O’Charleys expressed concern citing possible loss of revenue with their usual Sunday customers flocking to Chick-fil-a. Coincidentally, numerous churches across the southeast were encouraged by the possibility, noting that the quality of Sunday potlucks would vastly improve with CFA catering. “Mr. Trump might just be on to something” says Elmer Dotson, pastor of Big Ole Creek Baptist in Boone, North Carolina. “If Jesus can heal people on the Sabbath, surely we can eat tasty chicken sandwiches adorned with unassuming pickles”.

Like numerous other policy ideas from Donald Trump, political fact checkers are reviewing to see if it’s constitutional to force CFA to open on Sundays.

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