There are many things in the world which for some strange reason, are taboo to speak about. Which is a confusing human trait, as the only way we improve and normalise issues and taboo subjects, is by communicating and talking about them. One of the big elephants in the room is depression. It’s something which is prevalent and increasing in this day and age. However it remains something which is shameful and people are chastised as weak or a ‘sad type of person’, if depression is something they suffer from :(

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The reality is, there can be so many different triggers which cause depression. Much depression develops because of events which have occured in our lives. We are also all wired differently, which means that some of us can be more susceptible to chemical imbalances that trigger and promote depression, anxiety etc. It’s more important than anything to be conscious of other people and remember that we are all so different. Everyone has their battles and deals with them in different ways. The lucky ones are able to remain slightly more positive and the less fortunate ones can get consumed and go down a deep black hole.

It’s also quite interesting when we realise that many musicians and other creative and artistic people suffer from depression. They often use their skills and talents as a way of releasing the pain and anguish they are experiencing. Our guest this week, Simon Van Gend, is a South African musician who shares his story with us. We go deep and raw, he exposes himself and makes himself vulnerable, which we are grateful for.

Simon grew up in East London, South Africa, with his folks and older brother. He has memories of feeling very abandoned as a youngster. He also built up anger from an unmet need, in that, there was no place for anger in their household. In order to survive and get the love he needed, he had to completely bury his anger. What eventuates when that happens, is you get a depressed adult.

Simon is a musician through and through, who totally loves his art. He analogises listening to a good song as, “It‘s like waking up from a dream which you think is weird, but you feel good after”. When he was a teenager, he was shown a video of Simon and Garfunkel, live in Central Park, it ‘spoke a different language’ to him and that’s how and when, he started experimenting with music. Neil Young was another big influence in his life. Simon was inspired by the idea, of trying to do for other people, what Neil Young did for him…

When Simon finished university he went to his first therapist after his friends who had studied psychology, recommended it to him. There were two serendipitous moments which he speaks about in this chat, that had profound impacts on him and his life. One was, meeting an Italian lady in South Africa, who he taught English to. She happened to be a psychoanalyst and someone who ended up mentoring and helping him through his tough times.

He ended up going to Italy for a few months to stay with her and her family. It was an experience which restored him. He started recording more songs and singing in restaurants too. It was also when he recorded his first album.

Since then he has recorded 4 other albums and is now recording his 6th. He has set himself a challenge of recording a new song every week, so he has a good selection to choose from. A massive feat indeed!

We discuss very important topics in this conversation, evolution, religion, science, serendipity, anger and depression, water shortages in Cape Town, our formative years, therapy, catharsis through music, vulnerability, Christopher Ryan, being polyamorous and most importantly, the light at the end of the tunnel.

In our eyes, Simon is a very brave man. He has a story which is more common than we may think. A musician finding his way in life, trying to crack the music industry. His music is top notch and we know that he is going to flourish in the near future. You can only root for guys like him. Simon, thanks for laying yourself bare and putting everything on the table. Your message is going to touch many more than you will ever imagine.

We hope you enjoy this conversation as much as we did.

Let’s find out what it means for Simon Van Gend, to be Ridiculously Human.

Your fellow beings

Craig and Gareth

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Ridiculously Human

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A Podcast hosted by two South African buddies, Gareth and Craig. We hold intriguing conversations with inspiring guests and create real human connection :)

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