Rita Balogun
Sep 5, 2018 · 4 min read

The Selfie Obsession.

To me, Social Media is equally as damaging as Porn. There I said it.

DISCLAIMER:

Now before I get a heap of insults as to why I am completely wrong I really would like for you to give me a chance to explain myself and then take a moment to think about it & you may still want to insult me and that’s okay. It’s just my opinion.

I love Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook etc as much as the next person so let’s make it clear that I’m not a girl living in a hole with no social media access neither do I shy away from endless selfies. I’m all for it, addicted to it and that’s my problem.

As much as we all say that Social media is this incredible movement for our generation and for the most part it is.. let’s face it, lives have been changed, careers have been created, radicalised all from this thing we call Social Media. It’s magical. I just can’t help but feel like it is doing more damage than good.

10 Years ago, if I was out and about I would probably see what I look like 2/3 times a day. Why? Because I wasn’t trying to take a #Selfie all the time mainly because my phone didn’t have a camera & there was nowhere to really post it. Back then if you had too many pictures of yourself you were seen as narcissistic and that wasn’t particularly seen as a good thing.

10 years ago, if you broke up with someone, that was it. Unless you went to school with them and they were the prick that moves on to date your bestie, you had nooooo clue what they were doing next.

Thanks to social media today… You know when your ex has not only moved on, you know where the first date was…. You know where the first kiss was….You know all of the cute things they now do together….You know when it’s getting really serious and you also know when they are getting married. Awesome.

How does that help the person that hasn’t quite moved on? How is it healthy to know all of that information? Even If you decide to unfollow every social media platform that they are on, since we live in a generation of “A RT will make me feel awesome today, let me jump on any kind of news, talk about everything that isn’t my business, since we follow each-other we are best friends “ kind of generation you can be rest assured that you will be aware of what’s happening with your ex because some person that you both know will RT it.

Crazy.

If you are lucky enough not to see anything, you search for it. At the time we tell ourselves that this is going to help us feel better. So you twitter stalk, search Instagram and you see everything. You feel good for a second and then you feel a little sick with hurt, sick with disappointment… It suddenly doesn’t feel so good anymore.

A little similar to Porn, right? You watch it, it feels good then suddenly.. it doesn’t. In more damaging cases you can’t even be intimate with someone in person because it’s not like the scenes you were watching the night before. But of course you only watch it so you can be aroused, be “good” at sex and I guess, you can understand the female/male anatomy but you can’t always apply porn to reality because it’s not.

Same way social media is this place of filtered realness. You see a picture of a couple and assume that they are way happier than you. You see someone dressed in all designer items and you believe they are richer than you; You see someone post spiritual quotes everyday and you assume that they are more spiritual than you. It’s this world of So and So must be doing better than me because so and so tweeted, took a picture of blah blah blah.

It’s not healthy for personal growth, it’s not healthy for mental stability. It’s just a heap of information that we don’t really need to know but we do.

Thanks to social media our perception of beauty is so flawed.

10 years ago how was posing naked another form of feminisim? Yes it’s your body but being naked is not Feminisism when you are only doing it because you know deep inside that you are going to get over 100 likes.. that to me is slavery, it’s control, that is not freedom.

Slave to the trade, Slave to the rush of temporary fulfilment when you get *love struck eyes* under your picture.

How many times have you posted a picture and deleted it immediately because it didn’t get the reception you thought it would?

I’ve done it SO many times I have lost count. Why can’t we just post a picture because we like it? It’s almost like we’re only amazing if everyone agrees… or at least a few hundred people do.

I wish I could walk away from this article knowing that I’m not going to post another #Selfie but I am. I’m probably going to post one to promote this Article…

I just want to emphasise that although Social Media can be a great platform; If you find yourself checking your face 20 times a day taking a #Selfie for approval or you suddenly become a detective using your social media to stalk your ex or “enemy” then that’s no longer fun. You are doing something potentially damaging to your soul and if you can’t stop it, it’s an addiction one similar to Porn.

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