Helping others a burden or a life’s work?
Since I was a little girl I knew my special ability was to help others make sense of themselves. That was easy. The difficult part is detaching from the others pain.
I’ve been happy, I’ve been sad, I’ve suffered great losses, my heart has been broken more than once, but still I insist in taking care of others as I take care of myself. Because that’s my mission. It’s no use running away from it. And I’m sure most women reading this feel exactly the same way. Like we are mothers for all the people that cross our path, one way or another.
The difficult thing is to keep ourselves in our own path. Not to lose focus on the way. Keep steady and firmly on keeping our goals to be the best version of ourselves while helping others. It’s a full-time job. And learn it a little bit more every single day.
I can tell you that for me the major thing is to do everything with love, even when you feel hurt, do it with love, with empathy. With all the stillness possible and be calm about your words and gestures.
And always keep in mind that you have absolutely no idea what the other person is going through. You just have a wild guess. It’s impossible to be in someone’s else’s skin.
What I’ve learned so far and I want to share with you:
- Kindness is the key to open someone’s heart.
- You will never, ever think you know what the other person is going through.
- Don’t make comparison between you and others, just use has examples to get your idea trough.
- If someone needs to cry, just sit by their side and listen, wait, be patient and never, ever tell someone that crying it’s not worth it.
- Don’t force your help to someone who’s not ready to receive it.
- Let people take their time, everyone has absolutely different timing then yours, don’t have any expectations that things are going to happen in your desired timings.
- Read, read and read some more, books, articles, whatever you can get your hands on, read, learn, think think about and transform that knowledge to your day to day life.
- Always keep in mind that we are unique individuals, everyone is a different person, different ways of reacting and doing things, don’t expect them to react like you and don’t be disappointed when they don’t. They are they’re one person.
- Think before you speak, choose your words wisely and kind. Even when what you want to say it’s not easy to say or hear, do it. Take your time before speaking.
- Do all of this being yourself. Never losing your core values and personality.
- And do it without expecting nothing. No reward indented.